When your best friend’s acting a little too chipper and friendly for someone in a Mexican standoff with a Gothamite hit squad…
Red Hood: *whispering* What’s wrong with you? Are you… drunk?
Arsenal: No!
Arsenal: Yes.
Red Hood: What the heck happened to you?
Arsenal: I found a liquor store.
Red Hood: And?
Arsenal: I drank it.
Justice League membership deliberations…
Green Arrow [to Batman]: So, you know you can’t trust them, right? You know Red Hood and Arsenal are absurdly, irrationally, turbulently codependent on each other, right?
Jason: Hey, when I want to drink, I drink. When I want to smoke, I go get some cigarettes. Same goes for a sandwich or a fight.
Roy: So… You’re saying you’re just well-adjusted?
Jason: Heck, no. I’m just well-fed. *chomps on a burger*
Overheard from the apartment downstairs…
Feet: *scrambling across the floor*
Something: *hissing violently*
Jason: Go ahead, Roy. Do it. But I’m gonna warn you, when I come back, I’m gonna be pissed.
Door: *slammed*
Angst, a summary…
Arsenal: You can either go or help me.
Red Hood: Okay, I’ll go.
Arsenal: Okay, but before you go, can you help me?
After arguing about whose turn it was to do the laundry at the safe house after an exhausting night of patrol…
Roy [to Jason]: You know, I would storm out of here right now!
Roy: … If I had some money or a place to go.
Jason: Losers walk.
Roy: Oh, yeah? Losers talk.
Jason: No, no, no. Actually, losers rhyme.
Flipping your safe house be like…
Roy: Oops! Sorry, Jaybird. Did I get ya?
Jason: No, you didn’t get me, Roy. It’s an electric drill. You get me, you kill me!
When Bizarro learned to cook for breakfast…
Roy: Whose eggs do you like better, his or mine? Huh?
Jason: Well, I… like both eggs equally.
Roy: Oh, come on! Nobody likes two different kinds of eggs equally. You like one better than the other, and I wanna know which!
Jason: Well, what’s the difference? Your eggs aren’t here anymore, are they? You took your eggs and you left! Did you really expect me never to find new eggs?
Well, technically, you left, Jay, but whatever.
Jason and Roy: *taking turns playing Batman: Arkham Knight on Xbox*
Jason and Roy: *hear alarm blaring*
Roy: Is that the fire alarm?
Jason: Yeah. *feels the floor* Oh, it’s not warm yet. We still have time.
Roy: Cool.
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