At the Annual Justice League Sports Meet…
Green Lantern: *reading the mechanics* Number one is being able to run two miles in under five minutes. That’s a typo, right? That’s not humanly possible.
The Flash: *looks at the camera like he’s on “The Office”*
Your best buddy’s right there, Hal.
At the Annual Justice League Halloween Party…
Clark: I’m a prince!
Diana: I’m a mermaid!
Bruce: I’m Batman.
Green Lantern: Mr. Wayne, I want to do things the Batman way.
Batman: Wonderful. First rule. No conversation lasts longer than a hundred words. You have used ten. I just used nineteen.
Batman: *walks away*
There, there, Simon. It’s not you. He’s just had quite a history with Earth Lanterns.
Batman: *enters the room*
Green Lantern (Jessica): … Did you just pee your space-pants?
Green Lantern (Simon): Just a dab.
Batman/Superman: Teenage AU…
Superteen: Before I save the world, you have to spend the week doing everything I say.
Bat-teen: So, what, I have to be your slave or something?
Superteen: No. You have to be my friend, Bruce.
Bat-teen: Ugh. That’s so much worse.
Batman: Jordan’s the worst person I’ve ever met.
Batman: I want to travel the Multiverse with him.
When the success of your first mission with the Justice League’s got you so hyped up that you can’t help but hug the colleague standing next to you…
Batman: *body stiffens*
Green Lantern: Oh, uh…
Batman: *loudly clears throat*
Green Lantern: *slowly lets go and steps back*
Green Lantern: Sir, I formally retract my hug. *offers to shake hands with a sheepish grin*
Don’t worry, Baz. It’s not you.
Introducing himself to other superheroes be like…
Batman: Hi. My name is Batman. I am Superman’s work-proximity associate.
In which Clark gives him a side-glare. “What he meant to say was best friend and closest confidante.”
Getting into a fight at a special Justice League appearance for charity be like…
Green Lantern: Bruce, I just want you to know that I am not sorry for pushing your face into a cake.
Batman: Well, I am. For attending a public event.
Inviting your workaholic, case-obsessed colleague to dinner be like…
Batman: I’ll take that steak to go. Please and thank you.
The rest of the Justice League: *blink*
Gotta give him props for even acknowledging the food.
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