The Flash: What do you mean there’s a missile heading for us?!

Green Lantern: How is “missile heading for us” confusing?

When the Justice League get stranded on a power-dampening island…

The Flash: This isn’t Gilligan’s Island! We can’t just take a couple of coconuts and make a dialysis machine.

Batman:

my incorrect #hashtags (so far…)

batman in love – Bruce, Selina, and their sappy, unconventional relationship

big brother of the year – mostly Jason being both the best and the worst older brother

family patrol nights – because they are as dorky as they are bad-ass

grumpy old kid – because Damian

hug monster – just Dick doing what he does best

mornings at the manor – the sitcom of my dreams

incorrect batfamily quotes

incorrect flash family quotes

incorrect justice league quotes

incorrect rhato quotes

incorrect super sons quotes

nights on the rooftop – for all those times Jim ended up talking to the air behind him
incorrect dc quotes
incorrect green lantern quotes

Green: You’re like egg salad at a picnic, Bruce. Even when you look good, we know you’re going bad.

Have you not read “The Dark Knight Returns”, Hal? He still kicks some serious ass in his old age.

Superman: Bruce, I hope this isn’t too personal but… is that a human heartbeat I’m hearing or are you just happy to see me?

Imagine: Bruce, when Hal and Barry ask him to settle their debate while he’s working on a case at the Watchtower.

Lois: *lying in bed, drawing circles on Clark’s bare chest using her finger*

Phone: *vibrates*

Clark: Ah, it’s Bruce.

Lois: Don’t get it.

Clark: It could be work.

Lois: That’s why I said don’t get it.

Superman: *looking on as Batman packs a Bat-duffel bag for an off-planet Justice League mission*

Superman: Bruce… Don’t you think the adoption papers are a little bit unnecessary?

Batman: Hn. I would agree with you a hundred percent on Opposite Day.

He’s must always be ready for anything, Clark.

CSI Barry Allen: *while examining a crime scene* ♫

We see big stars, tiny atoms, too, because that is what scientists do. We get the facts and say what’s true, because that is what scientists do. In darkest day, in blackest night, no science shall escape my sight!

♪

♬

Meanwhile, someone floating in outer space is getting teary-eyed over his adorkable best friend.

When you catch your wife reporting the news back on earth via the Watchtower satellite feed…

The Flash: Linda’s so hot.

Batman: Yes. She’s in Afghanistan. The temperature is frequently over a hundred degrees.