Jason: *walks into Tim’s bedroom*
Jason: So this is where germs are born…
Tag: incorrect batfamily quotes
Batman: *crashes through a second-story window*
Alfred: *dusting a bust* Master Bruce, the door was open.
Batman: *dusting glass shards off his suit* I know. I just love doing that.
Superman: You have eight kids?
Batman: … That I know of.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
The World’s Greatest Detective, everybody.
When your brother tries to convince you to perform a death-defying, two-man maneuver with him…
Red Hood: Dick, that’s acrobat stuff. I don’t have the expertise.
Nightwing: Jay, any idiot can be an acrobat.
Red Hood: I know, I just think –
Nightwing: I knew you thought that! I knew it.
Red Hood: You tricked me!
At a bar…
Bartender: Where’d you get that jacket?
Jason: *sips beer* I was buried in it.
Bartender:
Bartender: *awkwardly moves away*
Idk some Gothamites are wack, they’d probably be into it
Clark Kent, mild-mannered reporter of the Daily Planet, following up on a lead at said bar: Jason? What’re you doing all the way here? Does your fath- Bruce know you’re here?
Tim: I want to tell you my secret now.
Conner: Okay…
Tim: I see dead people.
Conner: …
Conner: In your dreams? While you’re awake? Dead people, like, in graves, in coffins?
Tim: Walking around like regular people.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Okay, first of all, those’re just Jason and Damian walking around the Manor. Secondly, GET SOME SLEEP, Timothy.
Batman: *enters the Batcave, half-naked in a singed and tattered Batsuit*
Batman: *heads directly to the Batcomputer, limping, dripping blood on the ground*
Nightwing:
Red Robin:
Robin:
Alfred:
Red Hood: Did you get in a tickle fight with Edward Scissorhands?
When the Batboys disagree with Bruce…
Dick is the son who likes to (dramatically) talk it out with him (and hopefully hug it out after)…
Jason, the one who would rather steer clear of him to avoid a fist fight or any form of parenting from him…
Tim, the one who drowns himself in work (perhaps to collect enough evidence to prove his point)…
Damian, the one who makes snarky comments and spiteful comebacks, but ends up doing what his father says anyway.
*shrugs* Probably.
Red Hood: *wiping blood away from his busted lip* You made one big mistake, you ancient dirtbag.
Ra’s al Ghul: And what was that?
Red Hood: You pissed off your grandson.
Robin: *spits out a broken tooth and cracks his knuckles*
When your brothers presesure you to hang out with them…
Tim: I kind of have plans.
Dick: You have another family?
Tim: Yeah, I, uh… I have a date.
Damian: You have a date?
Tim: Yes! I have a date.
Dick: With a… girl?
Tim: No, with a crouton. *rolls eyes* What is so strange about me having a date?
Jason: With a crouton?