Dick: *proudly showing off his perfectly fitted, new Nightwing suit from Wayne Tech* I even picked out a nice outfit –
Jason: Oh. Why didn’t you wear it?
Tag: incorrect batfamily quotes
Selina: I love Bruce, but I don’t know about him raising a child.
Dick: He raised me.
Selina: Well, now you’ve put me in an awkward position.
Nightwing: *tying up a criminal*
Nightwing: Sorry I aggravated you. But just so you know, a lot of people think I’m adorable.
Bruce trying his hand at fatherhood…
Bruce [to Damian]: Here’s some money. *hands over $100*
Bruce: Go see a “Star War”.
Teaching your little brother (who was raised by assassins in a mountain far away) about sports be like…
Dick: *setting up the rims and nets*
Jason: *dribbling the balls*
Tim: *configuring the shot clock*
Damian: *putting on his cleats* I’ve never played basketball. I’m certain I’ll pick it up. Who’s going to be goalie?
Tim: *tightening his tie and straightening out his double-breasted suit in front of a mirror*
Tim: I’m going to the movies with Tam. I don’t want her to think I think it’s a date.
Jason: Do you think it’s a date?
Tim: *clipping his cuff links and shining his black Oxford shoes* No, but she might think I think it’s a date, even though I don’t.
Jason: Or you might think she thinks you think it’s a date, even though she doesn’t.
Tim: *grooming his hair* Are we overthinking this?
Jason: *handing him a bouquet of roses and a box of chocolates* Not at all.
Expectation vs. Reality…
[Expectation] Dick: Bruce, I know what you’re going to say, and believe me, I totally agree with you. There is no excuse for what I did. It was idiotic, immature, totally reckless, and I’m really sorry. I’m just hoping against hope that you will give me another chance, which I admit I don’t deserve. If you could just find it in your heart to forgive me, I know I could earn your trust back.
[Reality] Jason: It’s not like it was even the Batmobile!
Tally posted on the Wayne Manor refrigerator…
Sass-Off Points:
Team Alfred – 62,437
Team Bruce & Kids – 0
Torn apart furniture. Food and some sort of ink (or is that blood?) smeared all over the walls and carpets. A scorched living room ceiling. Tim tries to explain what happened to a visiting Conner…
Tim: It would take hours to explain the psychology of this event, so I’ll just simplify.
Tim: *points at Damian* “Dynamite”.
Tim: *points at Jason* “Kid with matches”.
Dick [to Tim]: I don’t believe it…. You’ve turned into Bruce!
Tim: Yeah? Well, sometimes Bruce’s right.
Jason: You take that back!
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 