When your older brother loves trying new, um, looks…
Tim: Does Dick remind you of someone?
Jason: He looks like an example photo at the barber shop.
Tag: incorrect batfamily quotes
“How to Comfort Your Brother” by Jason Peter Todd…
Jason [to Tim]: I’m not saying you’re a mess… but I’m not saying you’re not.
When you’re preparing for a hot date and your brother comes by to rain on your parade…
Jason: Why are you wearing a wetsuit?
Dick: This isn’t a wetsuit. These are skinny pants and a fitted shirt.
Evenings in the Batcave…
Batman: *typing on the Batcomputer*
Red Robin: *tuning up the Redbird*
Batman: Fart.
Red Robin:
Red Robin: Uh…
Red Robin: Did you say “fart”?
Batman: Yes. That’s me being rather silly.
And, to this day, no one believes Tim.
Blüdhaven housewarming…
Red Hood: *crashes through the window*
Red Hood [to Dick]: Here, I brought you an orchid from Trader Joe’s, because I don’t know or care about any of your interests.
Aw, Jay. Ya shouldn’t have.
Blüdhaven housewarming…
Red Hood: *crashes through the window*
Red Hood [to Dick]: Here, I brought you an orchid from Trader Joe’s, because I don’t know or care about any of your interests.
Aw, Jay. Ya shouldn’t have.
Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: *picks up the Gotham Gazette*
Dick: *doing pull-ups using the kitchen chandelier*
Alfred: *tugs at Dick’s feet to get him off the chandelier*
Tim: *typing furiously on his laptop, eyes narrowed with concentration*
Jason: *pours a fifth shot of espresso into Tim’s mug*
Damian: *picks bacon off Jason’s plate and feeds it to Alfred the Cat*
Bruce: *puts down the newspaper, buries his face in a hand and shakes his head*
Bruce: Just one question, boys. Do you get pleasure out of humiliating your family?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
I’d say stick to the Business Section, Bruce, but I guess it’s kind of hard to avoid the headlines, huh?
Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: Good morning, everyone!
Alfred:
Dick:
Jason:
Tim:
Damian:
Bruce: *sits down on the kitchen table, pours himself a cup of coffee, and picks up the Gotham Gazette*
Jason [to Tim]: *whispering* Ah, crap. He’s in love again.
Because a cheerful Bruce is a suspicious Bruce. (And that might have something to do with a certain, um, Cat.)
“Death of the Family” be like…
Nightwing: Wait a minute… Jay, are you clapping?
Red Hood: Yeah.
Red Robin: So, your hands are free?
Red Hood: Yeah.
Robin: Joker didn’t tie up your hands?
Red Hood: *shrugs* No. He must’ve forgotten.
Batgirl: Do you realize that we’ve been sitting here for 14 hours?
Red Hood: Well, get pissy if you want, guys! But I’ve enjoyed the time we’ve spent as a family. *sulks*
Mornings at the Manor…
Damian: *preparing his dental hygiene paraphernalia*
Jason: *standing in front of the mirror, peeling dead skin off himself*
Damian: Gross, Todd!
Jason: Hey, Little D! Want some double-dead beef jerky? *tosses the skin at Damian*
And the ensuing destruction of Wayne Manor property has forced Bruce to have two separate bathrooms constructed.
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