Preparing for an undercover mission at a Wayne Foundation charity gala for children be like…
Dick: We can’t all be Cinderella.
Tim: Then how do we decide?
Jason: Well, it’s simple. This was my idea. I’m driving. I’m Cinderella. If you bitches got a problem with that, we can stop the car right now.
Damian: *sulking in his Winnie the Pooh costume* -Tt-
Damian: All I needed was the Batplane, so why is it full of you idiots?
Tim: I wasn’t gonna sit around the Batcave all by myself.
Dick: One of us needed multi-engine time for his pilot’s license.
Jason: And one of us would go pretty much anywhere to piss off your father.
The Batboys, getting off a plane, hands up in surrender, at gunpoint by the Air Force…
Dick: Don’t shoot!
Jason: We’re coming out, don’t shoot!
Air Force: *shouting at them to drop their weapons*
Tim: *cursing under his breath*
Jason: Do not shoot! Guys, it’s okay, I – Q clearance! I’ve got Q clearance!
Damian: Seriously, is that even a real thing?
Colonel: Q clearance? Let’s see about that. What’s your authentication phrase?
Jason: Sweet, dash, 44, tender, dash, 9, hot, dash, juicy. Porkchops.
Tim and Damian: *glaring*
Jason: *shrugs* I didn’t pick it.
Tim: Tam! I mean, Ms. Fox.
Tam: Tam’s fine.
Tim: *grins* I’ll say.
Tam: You’ll say what?
Tim: Uhhh, nothing?
Tam: Ahhh. A man of mystery.
Bruce: Because I don’t want it in the Batmobile.
Jason: Well, what do you want me to do, Bruce?
*Jason holds up a used airsickness bag*
Jason: Just throw it out the window?
Bruce: *through gritted teeth* Obviously.
Jason: Oh.
*Jason throws the bag out the car window, hitting Damian*
Damian: TODD!
Jason: Ha, ha!
When you’re greeted by excited squeals and dreamy sighs (in true Wayne fashion) on your first day at Gotham Academy…
Damian: Hello, female children.
Damian: Grayson, you hid my knives like I’m a child! And Todd got me those for my birthday, so if you don’t give them back, I’m telling!
First of all, you are a child, Damian. And secondly, really, Jason?
Taking refuge at your brother’s Blüdhaven apartment be like…
Jason: *pulling on the sleepwear he borrowed earlier*
Jason: How do you sleep in these things, Dick? Silk pajamas on satin sheets. I slid out of the bed, like, three times.
Taking refuge at your brother’s Blüdhaven apartment be like…
Jason: *pulling on the sleepwear he borrowed earlier*
Jason: How do you sleep in these things, Dick? Silk pajamas on satin sheets. I slid out of the bed, like, three times.
(Finally) Visiting your older brother’s Blüdhaven apartment after he begs you for the nth time…
Jason: *listening for Dick’s movements in the kitchen*
Jason [to Tim and Damian]: *whispering* Look, if we don’t leave now, he’ll use food and guilt to keep us here for the rest of our lives.
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