Dick: You know what life is really about?
Damian: I’m twelve –
Dick: Brotherhood. You and me. Right here, Little D. Yeah. Us. That’s what it’s about.
Tag: incorrect batfamily quotes
When Batman gets a cold…
Superman: Bruce, don’t you think you’re overreacting?
Batman: *rummaging through his file cabinets and lab equipment in the Batcave*
Batman: When I’m lying comatose in a hospital, relying on inferior minds to cure me, these cultures and my accompanying notes will give them a fighting chance, Clark.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~
Shoot at him. Set him on fire. Send him to alternate dimensions not compatible with human survival. Just… not the common cold.
Telling your teammates about your little brother be like…
Cassie: You… you know you’re describing a dog, right?
Tim: He did bite me once.
Taking your circus-raised son to a gala be like…
Dick: *grabs three empty champagne flutes from a table*
Dick: Have you ever tried to juggle?
Bruce: Yes. I’m juggling my love for you and my embarrassment of you right now.
When your eldest brother asks you to look after his Blüdhaven apartment while he’s away on a mission…
Red Robin: Oh, come on, Dick’s a grown man. He can take care of himself.
Red Hood: *opens the refrigerator to reveal a bottle of curdy milk, a half-eaten sandwich, and a bowl of soggy Cheerios*
Red Hood: *looking unimpressed* You really believe that?
Damian: Drake’s upset with me, and I’m not clear as to why.
Jason: Okay, were you talking before you he got upset?
Damian: Yes.
Jason: That’s probably it.
Dick and Jason: *watching as Tim downs his fourth cup of coffee, spilling some on his ketchup and mustard-stained shirt, burps loudly, and wipes dried slobber off his face*
Dick: *sighs*
Jason: I love him, but if he’s broken, let’s ask Bruce not to get a new one.
When it’s your last night at the Manor before you go back to your own safe house and your little brother’s being a creep…
Jason:
Jason: *eyelids fluttering*
Jason: *eyes wide open*
Damian:
Jason:
Damian: I’m listening to you snore. I’m wondering how I’ll ever sleep without it.
Jason: If it helps you sleep, then why are you perched on my bedpost staring at me like a tiny boogeyman?
Damian: Really, Todd? Insults? After I spent two hours in your closet waiting for you to fall asleep?
When you visit your eldest brother’s Blüdhaven apartment and ask him (authoritatively) to pick up after himself…
Damian: Why are you being a baby, Grayson?
Dick: I’m not a baby! I’m a grown man and I made my bed! Now where’s my Coco Crunch?
Mornings at the Manor…
Tim: *wiping the sleep from his eyes and yawwwwwwniiiing*
Dick: *in a contorted bodily position beyond human understanding* Hey, Timmy. Want to do yoga with me?
Tim: Um, let me just have some coffee first, and then I’ll have the strength to tell you how much I won’t be doing that.
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