When your son’s pretty chummy with “Fun Uncle Supes”…
Bruce [to Dick]: Clark is inviting you to lunch at the Fortress.
Bruce: Hn.
Bruce: The good thing is, I get to come, too.
Tag: incorrect batfamily quotes
Timothy Jackson Drake, a saga…
Batman: Robin. Are you sleeping while on patrol?
Robin: Uh, uh… No! There’s, uh… a… bug in my eye and I’m trying to suffocate it.
Imagine: Jason, to a bartender. (Or, alternatively, Red Hood, to a bound and gagged criminal sweating out of fear.)
Running a few errands before meeting up with his brothers on Family Patrol Night…
Red Hood: *slaps $1000 on the counter* I need an Advil, a roll of duct tape, a pack of peanuts, and four beers.
Store clerk: *blinks*
When your younger brother’s the CEO of a multibillion-dollar company…
Jason: Timbo, I need 75 bucks for the new Arkham Knight game.
Tim: *deadpan stare*
Tim: 75 bucks for a video game?
Jason: Yes. See it as an investment.
Tim: *narrowed eyes* An investment?
Jason: Yes. See it this way: If I become a villain with “daddy issues” in another universe, I’ll already know how to do it properly.
Jason: Did I tell you I got pepper-sprayed today?
Tim: You say that like it’s a good thing.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
And that was just for entering Damian’s room.
Imagine: Bruce trying to be a “cool dad”.
Bruce: It’s tough love.
Dick: You do know that there are other kinds, right?
Getting stranded up in the Himalayan Mountains while on a mission be like…
Red Robin: Look, I’m sure we’re not the only ones who need to be rescued. Plus, things could be a lot worse.
Red Hood: Yeah, how’s that?
Red Robin: We could be stuck here with Damian.
Damian [to Bruce]: Father, I have this theory that Drake purposely installs complicated technology so he has a reason to talk to me like I’m a child.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 