Tag: grumpy old kid

When you get off patrol and your little brother insists that you read him a bedtime story…

Dick: Then the prince and the princess… got, um, married and lived happily ever after…

Damian: Then what happened, Grayson?

Dick: Uh… They had… thirty sons and thirty daughters.

Damian: What were their names?

Dick: Hmm… Dennis… Brad… Mavis… Brad… Bra… ZzzzZzz…

Damian: -Tt-

Damian: *tugs on his blanket and covers his snoring older brother with it*

On the last day of March, thirty minutes before midnight…

Somewhere on the Manor grounds…

Robin [on the Comm Link]: *sounds of rustling leaves and scraping metals in the background* You’re going down, Todd. I’m going to fool you!

Red Hood: *stuffing a sack with batarangs and Damian’s underwear* You talk better than you fool, kid.

Robin [on the Comm Link]: Oh, I will fool you up real nice.

Red Hood: You couldn’t fool your cleverest brother on the fooling-est day of your life if you had an electrified fooling machine.

~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~

In which, as tradition goes, Alfred already has the Batcave’s surgical bay ready in time for the first of April.

Batman: Stay with Tim.

Robin: -Tt-

Robin: One doesn’t stay “with” Drake. One stays “despite” him.

Red Robin: Look, Brat, I’m not thrilled either, but one day we might need each other for a transplant so we better keep the lines of communication going.

Robin: *sneaking out of the Manor at midnight*

Jason: *turns a lamp on*

Jason: *sitting in the dark with his legs crossed and a novel on his lap* Where are you going, Brat?

Robin: -Tt-

Robin: I don’t know.

Jason: When will you be home?

Robin: I’m not sure.

Jason: Where are you going?

Robin: You already asked me that, Todd!

Jason: Will you bring me back something?

~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~

This is why you’re secretly Dami’s favorite older brother sometimes, Jay.