Damian: *walks away after insulting Jason*
Jason: He’s a mean kid.
Tim: So, what? You’re mean, too.
Jason: Yes, but not to you!
Tim: Yesterday you told me my head was too big for my neck.
Jason: That was… constructive criticism.
Tim: Well, what am I supposed to do about it, Jay?!
Jason: As a brother, my job is only to point things out.
Tag: grumpy old kid
Robin: *walks into the Batcave*
Red Hood: Hey, Bruce, is it Bring-Your-Brat-to-Work Day?
Red Robin: Yeah, one of those things wandered in here.
Damian: *building a LEGO Death Star*
Damian: -Tt-
Damian: *yelling* Drake! I need your help!
Tim: In your room? You’re letting me go into your room?!
Damian: *guarding the door at Red Robin’s Nest*
Tim: *on a gurney*
Jason: *knocks*
Damian: *opens the door* Todd, this really isn’t the best time. Drake is pretty sick.
Jason: Oh, no. Poor Timbo. Is Damian taking good care of you?
Tim: Not really.
Jason: Would you like me to take care of you?
Tim: Not really.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
Where’re Alfred and Dick when you need ‘em?
At the Batcave’s Minor Procedures Room…
Alfred: *filling a syringe with anesthesia*
Red Hood: *gripping Damian’s hand with both of his*
Red Hood: It’s okay, little buddy, I’m right here with you. Go ahead, Alf.
Robin: Ow! Ow! Ow!
Red Hood: Hey, please go easy on the kid!
Robin: No, you’re squishing my hand, Todd!
Red Hood: Oh. Sorry. But did you feel the shot?
Robin: *glances at the newly emptied syringe being held by Alfred*
Robin: No.
Red Hood: You’re welcome.
Alfred: Perhaps you’d prefer to wait in your room, Master Jason.
Red Hood: I’d prefer a morphine drip and a sponge bath, but the kid needs me!
Mornings at the Manor…
Bruce: *picks up the Gotham Gazette*
Dick: *doing pull-ups using the kitchen chandelier*
Alfred: *tugs at Dick’s feet to get him off the chandelier*
Tim: *typing furiously on his laptop, eyes narrowed with concentration*
Jason: *pours a fifth shot of espresso into Tim’s mug*
Damian: *picks bacon off Jason’s plate and feeds it to Alfred the Cat*
Bruce: *puts down the newspaper, buries his face in a hand and shakes his head*
Bruce: Just one question, boys. Do you get pleasure out of humiliating your family?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
I’d say stick to the Business Section, Bruce, but I guess it’s kind of hard to avoid the headlines, huh?
In the Batplane…
Batman:
The Flash:
Batman:
The Flash: *shuddering*
Batman: You okay?
The Flash: *still trying to get over seeing Red Robin and Robin in action only a few moments back*
The Flash: You convinced two healthy kids to jump out of a plane. Is that even legal?
When asked what his spirit animal was…
Dick: I’m like a mother 🐻 –
Damian: *from the room down the hall* Grayson! Todd’s pissing me off!
Dick: When I hear my cub crying, I have to run to him. Now, if you’ll excuse me – 🏃♂
Why Tim decided that it was last time he’d ever introduce a hybrid human-Kryptonian friend to his brothers…
Conner: You’re mocking me, aren’t you?
Jason: Oh no, no no no, no…
Damian: *suddenly points behind Conner*
Damian: SUPERBOY, LOOK! AN ALIEN!
Conner: *looks* Where?
Jason and Damian: *keel over laughing*
Imagine: one actor, four Robins…
French actor and model Gaspard Ulliel as (clockwise from top left) Dick, Jason, Tim, and (grown-up) Damian.
Like Mikel Janín’s Batman art come to life.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 