Warehouse: *explodes*
Red Robin: *watches as debris slowly fall into the Gotham Harbor*
Red Hood: *looks at Tim questioningly*
Red Robin: Bruce’s not going to say anything because we’re not going to tell him.
Red Hood: We’re not?
Red Robin: No, we’re not.
Red Hood: Alright. I like that.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Because Tim would totally propose this and Jason would totally agree.
When you’re on the way to a suspect’s location and Waze is down (or Red Robin’s not answering for some reason *rolls eyes*)…
Robin: To which city are we near?
Nightwing: Coast! Fawcett! Oh, oh, Gateway!
Red Hood: Okay, why are you even answering?
Family Patrol Night…
Batman: I will go in and do this quietly.
Red Hood: Well, if that doesn’t work, we will come in to make some noise. *cocks guns*
Nightwing: *lights up escrima sticks*
Red Robin: *twirls bo staff*
Robin: *brandishes sword*
Bonus:
Superman: *hovers and winks*
Bruce, what made you even think that they’d stay behind?
When your adoptive father wants to have a private conversation with a colleague but you’re bored out of your mind and eavesdropping seems fun..
Nightwing [on the Comm Link]: *hanging from one of the ceiling stalactites in the Batcave* His mouth hasn’t moved in three and a half minutes.
Red Hood [on the Comm Link]: *crouching behind the glass case of his Robin uniform* Hal Jordan’s probably got him on hold.
Robin [on the Comm Link]: *sitting inside the dinosaur’s oral cavity* No, no. His nostrils are flaring. He’s pacing like a maniac.
Red Robin [on the Comm Link]: *viewing Batman from his own bedroom via a secret camera he installed on the Batmobile* And he just switched his phone from his right hand to his left hand like he wants to punch someone.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Perhaps because he knew that you boys have been listening in all along? Y’all ain’t slick.
Batwoman: *gesturing to a gagged and restrained henchman out of earshot* Would you like first crack at him?
Nightwing:
Red Robin:
Robin:
Red Hood: *steps aside* Kate, please, you’re our guest.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Let no one say that the Batboys aren’t gentlemen.
When your adoptive father’s being beaten up by Bane on national TV and you remember him ordering you to “stay out of it no matter what”…
Nightwing: *holding back angry tears*
Red Robin: *hacking into the satellites to disable public broadcasting*
Robin: *gripping his sword so hard that the handle nearly breaks*
Red Hood:
Red Hood: So what do we do now? Sit around and try not to die?!
Red Hood: *grabs his jacket and storms out of the Batcave*
When you spot the Batplane (and the four-foot teenager driving it) heading towards you…
The Signal: Why do I need back-up?
Robin [on the Comm Link]: No, no, you misunderstand, Thomas. You are the back-up. Baby steps.
Sorry, sweetheart. He likes pulling rank.
Red Hood: *cracks his knuckles*
Robin: *sneers*
Criminal [to his men]: Keep your distance, mates. The little one knows karate and the big one fights dirty.
Correction, mates. They both know karate and they both fight dirty.
When you find out that one of the most dangerous criminal masterminds in the world has set up headquarters in Gotham City…
Red Robin: What should we do?
Nightwing: Stay away.
Red Hood:
Red Robin:
Robin:
Nightwing: … Or, if we’re stupid, we go there and set up surveillance.
Nightwing, Red Hood, Red Robin and Robin: *immediately jump out of their seats and start grabbing their gear*
Me: *yells as they race out of the Batcave in their respective vehicles* Take care, boys! I’ll try to calm your father down when he gets back from the Watchtower!
Family Patrol Night…
Robin: *takes his vibrating phone out of his pocket*
Robin: *frowns and puts it back* -Tt-
Red Robin:
Nightwing:
Robin: *takes his vibrating phone out of his pocket again*
Robin: Grrrr. *puts it on Silent Mode*
Nightwing: … ?
Red Robin: *gestures to Red Hood* He just learned how to “poke” on Facebook.
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