Red Robin: Did Nightwing and Red Hood turn off their mics?
Robin: I did. Those two gab like little school girls on the field. It’s murder on the ears.
Tag: family patrol nights
When you see footage of your father, who’s bruised, bloodied, bound and being taunted by a villanous metahuman, on the Batcomputer screen…
Nightwing:
Red Hood:
Red Robin:
Robin:
Alfred: *clears his throat*
Alfred: Boys, he wouldn’t want you involved –
Robin: *pulls his sword from its scabbard and releases Goliath from his cage*
Red Robin: *tracks the source of the footage and hacks into its system*
Red Hood: *reloads his guns and straps on explosives*
Nightwing: *lights up his escrima sticks* We’re already involved. We’re family, Alfred.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
I mean it’s not as if Alfred left that footage to stream for you to “accidentally” find against Batman’s orders… Right?
When you’re doing surveillance and bored out of your mind and your little brother’s “lectures” aren’t helping…
Robin: What are you doing now, Todd?
Red Hood: *rolling up a piece of paper* Making a straw.
Robin: Why?
Red Hood: So I can shoot you with a spitball.
Robin: You’re not going to do that, and I’ll tell you why. This is a mission, I am your partner, and you’re going to treat me with the prop – *chokes a bit* You shot your spit in my mouth!
Red Hood: Is this gonna be a long night? Because I don’t think I could do that again.
To each his own…
Red Robin: *enters pass code*
Computer: ACCESS DENIED
Red Hood: Let me try mine.
Red Hood: *raises grenade launcher*
Red Hood [to thug]: I bark.
Red Hood: That kid there, see him? *points to Robin*
Red Hood: He bites.
Sneaking into Braniac’s ship be like…
Red Robin: Let’s just say we’re way past Wi-Fi.
Red Hood: Now this is a lair.
Imagine: Bruce trolling Jason during an undercover mission.
Mission on a remote island…
Red Robin: *cutting through jungle foliage with his bo staff* Brat, who are you talking to – Oh, #*$@!!!
Alien: BLARG!
Robin: *standing in front of the nine-foot-tall, Predator-looking creature, ready to defend it* Stop! He is my friend! He’s not going to eat anybody!
Red Hood: *yelling from behind a bush* Yeah! Says you stink too much to eat!
Mission briefing…
Nightwing: What is our number one problem right now?
Red Robin: *drinking his fifth espresso shot* I’m being forced to work with the brat who tried to murder me.
Robin: *crosses his arms* -Tt-
Family Patrol Night…
Nightwing: *stares questioningly at his brothers after hearing about a mission gone awry*
Red Robin: *wiping soot off his face and picking shrapnel from his uniform* Chalk that one up to Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum over there.
Red Hood: *scraping dried mud off his combat boots*
Robin: *throwing the shards that used to be his sword into a garbage can* -Tt-
Nightwing: Uh… Who are they?
Red Robin and Robin: THEY’RE BOTH JASON!
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