Giving your brother a tour of your new hometown be like…
Nightwing: This part of Blüdhaven might be very rough, but, Jay, the people here are the best!
Red Hood: *staring at his motorcycle* I’m pretty sure I had wheels when I parked here.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Ha! Serves you right, Jason Todd. Serves you right.
Tag: dick grayson
Dick: Listen to me, Damian. Your whole life has led to this moment.
Dick: All the training, the hours of dedication…
Dick: There’s not a soul alive that can touch you…
Dick: … when it comes to Laser Tag. And, Li’l Bro, you know it. *pats Damian’s armor* Look at me. Be you!
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
And that is how Dick and Damian impossibly beat the crap out of Jason and Tim.
Sometimes all it takes is a little pep talk from your favorite brother.
Dick: Why is your mouth red?
Jason: Duct-taped for two hours in a morgue drawer, don’t piss off the tiny brat, end of story.
Dick: *walks past Tim and Damian’s shared bedroom*
Dick: *hears loud thuds, scraping noises and muffled insults*
Dick: *knocks gently on the door* How’s it going in there?
Tim & Damian: GO AWAY!
Jason: *lights a cigarette by his doorway across from theirs* Wow. They kinda harmonized on that. Cool.
When Nightwing’s away, the other Robins will play…
Jason: *holding a bound, gagged, and very bored-looking Damian upside down* Permission to drop the little twerp into a deep, dark hole, Sir?
Tim: Granted.
Damian: -Tt-
When you’re trying to turn over a new leaf but your brothers miss the “chaotic-but-fun” you…
Jason: What is that?
Tim: *wiggles his eyebrows* Looks like a fuse.
Jason: All right, what exactly are you planning?
Dick: We’re planning to get you back. We want our brother back, the way he used to be.
Damian: Todd, we are well aware of how much you used to like fire, explosions…
Damian: *hands Jason a lighter*
Jason: *stares at it*
Jason: Nice try. That was a long time ago.
Tim: Really?
Jason:
Jason: *looks at the fuse again*
Jason: So, where does this go?
Dick: Well, I suppose you could find out by crawling over the fence and following the fuse. Or you could find out… *grinning* the Jason way.
Tim: We’re sure that you’ll make the right decision.
Jason: Guys, I’m telling you. Things are different now! I’m an adult, I have responsibilities. I’m just not a sixteen-year-old maniac anymore who –
Jason: *hears a click, then sees that his hand has already flicked the lighter on and is holding it to the fuse*
Jason: Huh. Interesting.
When you’re trying to turn over a new leaf but your brothers miss the “chaotic-but-fun” you…
Jason: What is that?
Tim: *wiggles his eyebrows* Looks like a fuse.
Jason: All right, what exactly are you planning?
Dick: We’re planning to get you back. We want our brother back, the way he used to be.
Damian: Todd, we are well aware of how much you used to like fire, explosions…
Damian: *hands Jason a lighter*
Jason: *stares at it*
Jason: Nice try. That was a long time ago.
Tim: Really?
Jason:
Jason: *looks at the fuse again*
Jason: So, where does this go?
Dick: Well, I suppose you could find out by crawling over the fence and following the fuse. Or you could find out… *grinning* the Jason way.
Tim: We’re sure that you’ll make the right decision.
Jason: Guys, I’m telling you. Things are different now! I’m an adult, I have responsibilities. I’m just not a sixteen-year-old maniac anymore who –
Jason: *hears a click, then sees that his hand has already flicked the lighter on and is holding it to the fuse*
Jason: Huh. Interesting.
Nightwing [about Batman]: Why are you still antagonizing him?!
Red Hood: *shrugs* I don’t know. I can’t stop.
When your youngest brother wants to show you his appreciation…
Dick: You’re giving us… stickers?
Damian: Not just any sticker. Those are stickers of a kitty saying, “Me-wow!”.
Tim: We’re not preschoolers.
Damian: Fine, I’ll take them all back.
Jason: I earned this! Back off!
Dick and Jason: *watching as Tim downs his fourth cup of coffee, spilling some on his ketchup and mustard-stained shirt, burps loudly, and wipes dried slobber off his face*
Dick: *sighs*
Jason: I love him, but if he’s broken, let’s ask Bruce not to get a new one.
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