Batman: *studying a case on the Batcomputer*
Nightwing: *parkour-ing from giant memento to giant memento in the Batcave*
Red Hood: *aiming at the bats with his guns (”What? For target practice!”)*
Red Robin: *rambles on about his Multiverse theories to Bruce while dragging around an IV stand with a pouch of pure liquid caffeine*
Batgirl: *taking a selfie while Spoiler braids her hair*
Robin: *approaching Alfred with Batcow in tow (”I need more pet food, Pennyworth.”)*
Lark: *Snapchatting everyone while ducking to avoid Dick (”Typical Tuesdays”)*
Batman: *finds it hard to focus, stops typing*
Batman: *looks at the chaos that is his children*
Alfred: *serves Bruce some tea*
Batman: Alfred, this is like a waking nightmare of happiness.
Alfred: *grins and walks away*
Orphan: *hugs Bruce’s neck from behind*
Batman: *grins as his daughter skips away to join the fray*
Tag: dick grayson
Batman: I just don’t want you to lie to me, Dick. I don’t want you to ever lie to me. Have I ever lied to you?
Nightwing: Yup. *with an extra pop on the ‘p’*
Batman:
Batman: I just don’t want you to.
Post-traning session at the Manor…
Nightwing: *trying to catch his breath and wiping sweat off his face*
Red Hood: *examining his broken helmet while holding an ice pack against his temple*
Red Robin: *throwing his halved bo staff into the fireplace*
Nightwing [to Robin]: In everyone’s defense, I think the most worthy opponent of yours is… you.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Well, since your sisters were out shopping during this whole ordeal, one cannot say that with absolute certainty.
Family Patrol Night…
Nightwing and Red Robin: *watching Red Hood “interrogate” a criminal*
Nightwing: Uhhh… I think Jason may have snapped.
Red Robin: Or maybe he’s just stuck in character.
Nightwing: Which is worse? Snapped or stuck?
Red Robin: Both. They’re both worse.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Someone rescue that thug.
When Alfred leaves for a vacation…
Dick: *scouring the kitchen cabinets for cereal*
Jason: He left some snacks in the freezer for us.
Damian: You mean the frozen mice for the piranha?
Jason: No, the blueberry slurpy pouch.
Tim [to Dick]: *rolls his eyes* He means the ice pack.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
They must’ve missed the note Alfie stuck on the freezer door: “Young masters, for when you are incapable of behaving yourselves and are in need something to put over your or your brother’s black eye.”
Right before he got a taste of the infamous Dick Grayson temper…
Deathstroke: Nightwing, that’s a nice tan… But I’m surprised you get any sun at all, considering how much time you spend in Batman’s shadow.
Family Patrol Night…
Nightwing: *stares questioningly at his brothers after hearing about a mission gone awry*
Red Robin: *wiping soot off his face and picking shrapnel from his uniform* Chalk that one up to Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum over there.
Red Hood: *scraping dried mud off his combat boots*
Robin: *throwing the shards that used to be his sword into a garbage can* -Tt-
Nightwing: Uh… Who are they?
Red Robin and Robin: THEY’RE BOTH JASON!
Family Patrol Night…
Nightwing: *stares questioningly at his brothers after hearing about a mission gone awry*
Red Robin: *wiping soot off his face and picking shrapnel from his uniform* Chalk that one up to Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum over there.
Red Hood: *scraping dried mud off his combat boots*
Robin: *throwing the shards that used to be his sword into a garbage can* -Tt-
Nightwing: Uh… Who are they?
Red Robin and Robin: THEY’RE BOTH JASON!
Aqualad: And he likes Nightwing because… ?
Kid Flash: Because who wouldn’t?
Dick: *walks past Tim and Damian’s shared bedroom*
Dick: *hears loud thuds, scraping noises and muffled insults*
Dick: *knocks gently on the door* How’s it going in there?
Tim & Damian: GO AWAY!
Jason: *lights a cigarette by his doorway across from theirs* Wow. They kinda harmonized on that. Cool.