Mornings at the Batcave…
Tim: *downing a cup of espresso* Okay, we all know why we’re here, right?
Dick: *still in just boxer shorts, yawning and shaking his head*
Jason: *groans* No. Why?
Tim: To fight Damian, the bully. That tiny tween has been tormenting all of us for years, and I for one am sick of it! I can’t promise you victory. I can’t promise you good times. But the one thing I do know –
Dick and Jason: *head back to the Manor*
Tim: Whoa! Whoa! I promise you victory! I promise you good times!
Tag: dick grayson
Dick: Uh-oh. Damian’s gonna be mad.
Tim: Yeah, well, he’s twelve and tiny. What’s he going to do? Kick my ass?
Tim’s Brain: Again?
When you just can’t say no to a brother in need…
Nightwing: I’ll do it.
Red Hood: I knew you would. You’re very predictable.
Nightwing & Red Hood: No, I’m not.
Nightwing & Red Hood: Stop doing that!
Nightwing & Red Hood: Peanut butter egg cereal.
When your brother tries to convince you to perform a death-defying, two-man maneuver with him…
Red Hood: Dick, that’s acrobat stuff. I don’t have the expertise.
Nightwing: Jay, any idiot can be an acrobat.
Red Hood: I know, I just think –
Nightwing: I knew you thought that! I knew it.
Red Hood: You tricked me!
Wally: *scoffs* Don’t listen to Dick. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about. The guy eats cereal with a fork.
he wHAT
Nightwing, fresh from patrol with the Titans: *munching on said cereal* Look *swallows* I didn’t think I had to stop eating this stuff just because, uh… *looks around at all the unpacked boxes in his apartment* Look, I know the spoon’s in there somewhere. Been kinda busy. 🤷♂
Batman: *enters the Batcave, half-naked in a singed and tattered Batsuit*
Batman: *heads directly to the Batcomputer, limping, dripping blood on the ground*
Nightwing:
Red Robin:
Robin:
Alfred:
Red Hood: Did you get in a tickle fight with Edward Scissorhands?
When the Batboys disagree with Bruce…
Dick is the son who likes to (dramatically) talk it out with him (and hopefully hug it out after)…
Jason, the one who would rather steer clear of him to avoid a fist fight or any form of parenting from him…
Tim, the one who drowns himself in work (perhaps to collect enough evidence to prove his point)…
Damian, the one who makes snarky comments and spiteful comebacks, but ends up doing what his father says anyway.
*shrugs* Probably.
Wally: *scoffs* Don’t listen to Dick. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about. The guy eats cereal with a fork.
When your brothers presesure you to hang out with them…
Tim: I kind of have plans.
Dick: You have another family?
Tim: Yeah, I, uh… I have a date.
Damian: You have a date?
Tim: Yes! I have a date.
Dick: With a… girl?
Tim: No, with a crouton. *rolls eyes* What is so strange about me having a date?
Jason: With a crouton?
Robin: *skims a mission dossier*
Robin: -Tt-
Robin: Father would never ask me to do this.
Nightwing: No, you’re right. He wouldn’t. He’d ask me to ask you.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 