Tag: dick grayson

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Red Hood: We’re trying to piece together a night and we need your help.

“Ric” Grayson: I don’t remember that night.

Red Robin: We didn’t tell you which night yet.

“Ric”: *shrugs* I don’t remember most evenings.

Robin: *exasperated sigh*

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Why it sometimes takes forever for Batman’s sons to finish their meals (much to Alfred’s chagrin)…

Robin: *staring at a utensil on the dining table* All of my instincts and my training are telling me to use this like a weapon.

– • – • – • – • –

This is me going out on a limb here and assuming that this family still takes the time to eat.

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

When your grandsons, in an effort to step out of their father’s shadow, get an apartment of their own…

Nightwing’s uniform: *splayed on the couch along with Dick’s hair products and smelly socks*

Red Hood’s weapons: *lying in wait for someone to accidentally trip on them*

Red Robin’s coffee: *spilled all over the dining table – which also doubles as Tim’s makeshift bed – and his laptop*

Robin’s pets: *walking in and out of the bathroom, soaking wet*

Alfred: *looking around with a deadpan-but-clearly disappointed look on his face*

Alfred: *clears his throat as he steps over a fallen garbage can on the floor*

Alfred: Who washes the dishes?

Jason: *defensively raising his hands in front of his face* Nobody washes the dishes! We eat the food directly off the coffee table and you know it!

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

The Robins as…

Professional YouTubers

Dick:

  • Vlogs about mundane, day-to-day stuff, like his frustration with chafing in a full bodysuit or what it’s like growing up in a huge family
  • Replies to comments on his videos once in a while, which makes him even more endearing to his followers
  • Titans, in civilian wear, coming in and out of view (Wally: *yelling from the kitchen* D, you still gonna eat this?)

Jason:

  • Weapons – care, reviews, “Top 10” lists, demos
  • Witness protection-level of facial blurring and vocal disguise, and a disclaimer at the beginning of each video to discourage the young’uns from watching his stuff
  • “Gotta go” *abruptly shuts the camera off as Bruce’s shadow enters the frame*

Tim:

  • Life hacks, conspiracy theories, reviews of obscure music albums, meme meta-analyses
  • Videos uploaded during the wee hours of the morning (with him sometimes forgetting that he’s still wearing his blood-soaked uniform that’s tattered to the point of being unrecognizable)
  • “Thank you for attending my TED Talk” *finger guns, winks*

Damian:

  • Meditation techniques, wildlife conservation discussions (guest-starring Selina and his pets)
  • Leadership “seminars” with Jon (who’s constantly rolling his eyes or snickering), sparring sessions with Duke and his Batsisters, baking tutorials with Alfred
  • “Father, I need your opinion on – Father! Wait, don’t – Come back – BRUCE –”

– • – • – • – • – • –

Thank you for the suggestion, @strawberryjei !

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

In the Batmobile, heading home…

Batman: How long until we intercept Alfred?

Nightwing: Three minutes.

Batman: We run every red light.

Meanwhile, at the Manor…

Alfred: *preparing to make the dreaded cucumber sandwiches as a post-patrol snack *

~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~

To learn more about these “cukewiches”, check out Trinity (2008) #10 and Batman (2016) #16.