Superboy: So, why do you put up with Damian?
Red Robin: Because we’re brothers.
Superboy: Why?
Red Robin: Wow. You ask really hard questions.
Tag: damian wayne
Infiltrating a top secret government facility…
Red Hood: Why are you sitting in the stairwell?
Robin: Grayson told me to stay.
Red Hood: Oh.
Red Hood: *pats his head* Well, good boy.
Tim: *sobbing on the couch*
Damian: *pushes Tim, forcing him to scoot over, and grabs the remote*
Tim: I’m sorry, is the fact that my life’s falling apart interfering with your TV show?
Damian: *tunes in to Animal Planet*
Damian: *munching on popcorn* It is.
Tim [about Damian]: … And when I dropped him off at the Kent Farm, he even gave me a hug!
Jason: Did he think you were choking, or… ?
“Fatherhood for Dummies” by Bruce Wayne…
Dick: You’re writing Damian a check? What kind of gift is that?
Bruce: You told me he likes Transformer toys. This check transforms into any toy he wants.
At the Manor…
Jason: It’s because of you that Tim doesn’t want to come here anymore!
Damian: Good. Tell me what I did so that I can do it to you.
And the “Big Brother of the Year” Award goes to…
Dick: *baking cookies (Alfred’s recipe)*
Jason: *playing with Titus*
Damian: *arrives from Gotham High*
Damian: *slams his suitcase on the kitchen island*
Dick: …
Jason: …
Damian: *takes a seat on a stool, buries his face in his hands, and groans*
Dick: Soooo… How’s school?
Damian: *muffled* Okay.
Dick: Anything noteworthy happen?
Damian: *muffled* No.
Jason: *throws his hands up in the air* I thought you said he got dumped!
Dick: *through gritted teeth* I was easing into it.
Jason: Oh. Okay, go ahead.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~
It’s tie.
Tim [to Damian, or vice versa]: I don’t have to like you, I don’t have to be nice to you, and I can make fun of you whenever I want, because when it really comes down to it… I will always have your back.
When your detective of a father asks you and your brothers what happened to the Batmobile…
Bruce [to Dick, Jason, Tim, and Damian]: *narrows eyes*
Bruce: Usually, when everything’s normal, people don’t respond in perfectly rehearsed unison.
What Batman’s day is really like…
Dick: *watching on as one of his brothers does something*
Dick: Bruce? Did you just see – ?
Bruce: Yes. I’ll deal with that tomorrow.
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