Batman: *discussing the do’s and don’ts for an upcoming mission*
Red Hood [to The Signal]: *whispering* Don’t worry about it, man.
Red Hood: *gestures to his brothers and to himself* You’re kind of like a Robin now. We make our own rules.
Nightwing: *winks*
Red Robin: *grins*
Robin: *salutes*
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Bros before… broody, mood-killing, adoptive fathers clad in leather.
Tag: damian wayne
When your adoptive father wants to have a private conversation with a colleague but you’re bored out of your mind and eavesdropping seems fun..
Nightwing [on the Comm Link]: *hanging from one of the ceiling stalactites in the Batcave* His mouth hasn’t moved in three and a half minutes.
Red Hood [on the Comm Link]: *crouching behind the glass case of his Robin uniform* Hal Jordan’s probably got him on hold.
Robin [on the Comm Link]: *sitting inside the dinosaur’s oral cavity* No, no. His nostrils are flaring. He’s pacing like a maniac.
Red Robin [on the Comm Link]: *viewing Batman from his own bedroom via a secret camera he installed on the Batmobile* And he just switched his phone from his right hand to his left hand like he wants to punch someone.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Perhaps because he knew that you boys have been listening in all along? Y’all ain’t slick.
When you’re weary from patrol and craving for some shut-eye only to find intruders in your safe house…
Red Hood: …
Nightwing: *rummaging through the cabinets*
Red Robin: *installing security cameras in the living room*
Robin: *examining the samurai swords hanging on the wall*
Red Hood: I gave you my passcode for emergencies.
Robin:
Red Robin:
Nightwing: We were out of Doritos.
When you’re on the way to a suspect’s location and Waze is down (or Red Robin’s not answering for some reason *rolls eyes*)…
Robin: To which city are we near?
Nightwing: Coast! Fawcett! Oh, oh, Gateway!
Red Hood: Okay, why are you even answering?
Robin: When it comes to stupidity, I would not underestimate Todd.
Dick: *knocking on Tim’s bedroom door* Come on!
Damian: Drake! Open up. We would like to speak to you.
Tim: *muffled* I don’t feel like talking!
Dick: Oh, come on, Timmy, we care about you!
Cass: We’re worried about you.
Jason: And some of us really have to pee!
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: Hey, hands off my pickle, brat!
Damian: I don’t see your name on it, Todd!
Jason: No, but – *grabs the pickle and licks it*
Damian: Oh, yeah? *grabs it back and dunks it in his milk* Checkmate.
Jason: Huh. Always thinking two moves ahead.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Quit playing with your food, kids.
Mornings at the Manor…
Jason: *whistling while turning on the stove and beating eggs in a bowl*
Red Robin: *comes in through the kitchen window, bruised, tattered, and dripping blood*
Red Robin: Jay! I lost Damian! What am I going to do?!
Jason: Uhhhh. Don’t worry. Don’t worry. *looks around the kitchen in panic* Know what I’m going to do? I’m going to make you an omelet.
Red Robin: Just help me look for him!
Jason: Are you sure? I make ‘em with four kinds of cheese.
Mornings at the Manor…
Tim and Damian: *bickering at the breakfast table*
Bruce: Quiet, you two! If I hear one more word, Tim doesn’t get to drink coffee and Damian doesn’t get to go on patrol.
Tim: Bruce!
Damian: Father!
Bruce: Not. One. Word.
Tim and Damian: *start insulting each other by lightly tapping spoons and banging salt and pepper shakers*
Bruce: I thought I told you two to knock it off.
Tim: We didn’t say anything!
Damian: Not one word!
Bruce: Well, no Morse code either.
Family Patrol Night…
Batman: *setting up surveillance equipment on the rooftop*
Robin: *watching the traffic down below while perched atop a gargoyle*
Nightwing: *balancing on the ledge (y’know, upside-down and on one hand, the yoosh)*
Red Robin: Jay, I have a riddle for you. What’s the sound of one hand clapping?
Red Hood: Piece of cake. *opens and closes his fist quickly, which makes a faint sound*
Red Robin: No, man. It’s a 3000-year-old riddle with no answer. It’s supposed to clear your mind of conscious thought.
Red Hood: No answer? Timmy, listen up. *quickly opens and closes his fist again*
Batman: Hn. *smirks*
Nightwing: *giggles and almost loses his balance*
Robin: -Tt-
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