When he’s told that it’s his responsibility to mentor Conner…
Clark: Why can’t Bruce do it? He’s great with kids, especially when they’re not really his.
Meanwhile…
Bruce: *dialling Alfred’s number*
Bruce: Alfred? Hn.
Bruce: Fine, I owe you twenty dollars. Please prepare Dick’s old roo– All ready, huh? Of course.
Superman: I’m sorry.
Wonder Woman: Me, too.
The Flash: Me, three.
Batman: I have no need to apologize.
But of course. Because as far as Batman’s concerned, all of it was meticulously planned and expected. Just wait and see.
Superman: *clears his throat awkwardly* Because I value our relationship, Bruce, I need to be frank with you: We are in a fight.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
We know where Jon gets it from.
Saving the coordinates of his Fortress of Solitude on Batman’s communicator…
Superman: If you ever want to save the world again, you know where I am. *finger-guns*
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
Bat “Like I Don’t Already Know Where It Is” Man
Bat “Like I’m Gonna Call You” Man
Bat “I Hate Guns, Cut That Out” Man
Superman: I kind of feel like hugging you now.
Batman: As my friend, you know that would be a rash decision.
At last, the true origin story…
Superman: How do you do all that?
Batman: I was bitten by a radioactive detective.
When another Multiverse Crisis hits…
Superman: I always imagined you’d have a secret lair beneath a volcano for such an occasion.
Batman:
Batman: *grins*
At the Annual Justice League Halloween Party…
Clark: I’m a prince!
Diana: I’m a mermaid!
Bruce: I’m Batman.
When asked by the rest of the Justice League why they frequently go on missions without them…
Batman: Clark and I work because we keep an emotional distance.
Meanwhile, Superman: *looking at him with sad, puppy dog eyes*
When he’s told that it’s his responsibility to mentor Conner…
Clark: Why can’t Bruce do it? He’s great with kids, especially when they’re not really his.
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