When your son’s pretty chummy with “Fun Uncle Supes”…
Bruce [to Dick]: Clark is inviting you to lunch at the Fortress.
Bruce: Hn.
Bruce: The good thing is, I get to come, too.
Tag: clark kent
Helping Batman set up his answering machine be like…
Clark: Brooding expressions don’t show up on tape, Bruce. Use your words.
Clark, what would he even do with… ?
Superman: I just want to say that I’m honored you’re trusting me.
Batman: Oh, I’m not.
Did you mistake Bruce allowing you to know his secret identity, counting on you to save his life over and over, and leaving his three sons under your care during his battle with Bane for trust? Oh, Clark. You should know better.
When your super best friend could give Saran wrap a lesson…
Batman: *ignores vibrations coming from his pocket*
Wonder Woman: How many times a day does Clark text you?
Batman: Hrrrn.
Batman: Just… 40.
When you’re bored out of your mind at Kent Farm because your fathers are busy hanging out and won’t let you go on patrol without adult supervision…
Bruce and Clark: *chatting and drinking coffee*
Jon: *lies down on the grass* What are you doing?
Damian: *yawns* I’m just trying to throw batarangs at my father’s head, but the wind keeps taking it.
That one time – one time – Bruce tried this thing call “chilling out”…
Superman: This just… isn’t you.
Batman: It’s me now. It’s the me that can recline.
Batman: *leans back and falls off the Batcomputer chair*
Superman: Did that hurt?
Batman: Hrrn.
Only his ego, Clark. Only his ego.
Sometimes your best friend just needs to hear it from you…
Batman: *typing on the Batcomputer*
Superman: *whooshes into the Batcave* Oh, Bruce, I feel so foolish.
Batman: *reading casefiles* No.
Superman: Yes. I’m foolish and I’m funny and I’m needy. Am I needy?
Batman: *shuts down the Batcomputer* No.
Superman: Are you sure I’m not needy? ‘Cause I feel needy sometimes.
Batman: No. *walks out of the Batcave*
Superman: Do you ever get the feeling like you don’t even matter?
Batman: Only when I’m around my children.
—
Must be the midlife crisis talking, Bruce.
When Clark met his future BFF, Bruce…
Superman: *watching as Batman grapple-hooks away*
Superman: You’re gonna like me, Bruce Wayne. I’m just gonna let you pretend for a little while that you don’t already do.
Superman: *whooshes into the Batcave, frowning, arms crossed*
Superman: You don’t look well.
Batman: *coughing up blood, being stitched up by Alfred*
Batman: Well, only this morning I had a mystical dagger embedded in my chest, so I’d say I’m holding myself together quite well.
You know it’s just another Tuesday for him, Clark.
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