Superman: Bruce, I’m not going to lie to your son.
Batman: Come on, Clark. I lie to my sons all the time.
Tag: clark kent
When you and your best friend get into a heated argument about fatherhood…
Bruce: *referring to the situation with Kon-El* Unlike you, I can’t just walk away from my children.
Clark: At least my children can look me in the eye and know that I never lie to them.
At the Justice League beach trip…
Bruce: *setting up miniature surveillance equipment and burying them in the sand*
Clark: *rolls eyes* Tell me you know how to swim.
Bruce: I know how to swim, Clark. I swim for survival, not for fun.
Clark Kent, a.k.a. Superman: You give me a gift? Bam! “Thank You” note. You invite me somewhere? Pow! RSVP. You do me a favor? Wham! Favor returned. Do not test my politeness.
Superman: You know?
Batman: When do I not know?
Superman: How do you do it, guess things?
Batman: I observe, and then I deduce.
Superman: How did you know I was a farmer? You said you could tell from my hand.
Batman: Hands, plural. It had calluses, not soft.
Superman: How did you know my family was Kryptonian?
Batman: Google. Not everything is deducible.
Batman: You know, Superman, I take it all back. I’m beginning to find your companionship extremely useful.
Superman: *grins proudly*
Batman: It’s like white noise. It puts me in a state where I think and observe better.
Batman and Superman undercover (as their civilian selves) on official Justice League business…
Bruce: Nice room.
Clark: I took the liberty of booking the whole floor. Your card.
Bruce: Guess I can use the miles.
Having lunch with your best friend be like…
Bruce [to the waitress]: I will have a glass of your oak-iest chardonnay, please.
Clark: And I will have a waffle with your maple-iest syrup.
Superman: *hovering in the Gotham night sky* Come on, Bruce! When’s the last time we actually had dinner together?
Batman: *spying on a mob boss from five rooftops away* Four PM, Pacific Time, New Year’s Eve.
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