When you cross paths with your big brother at his day job…
Officer Grayson [to witness]: *grinning* I was gonna ask you the same question…
Red Robin: *whispering* Dick, this woman witnessed a crime.
Officer Grayson: *whispering back* Yeah, a crime in progress. She’s stealing my heart, but I ain’t pressing charges. *winks at witness*
Red Robin: *facepalms*
Tag: caffeinated crusader
Imagine: one actor, four Robins…
French actor and model Gaspard Ulliel as (clockwise from top left) Dick, Jason, Tim, and (grown-up) Damian.
Red Hood v Red Robin: Dawn of Science…
Jason: Tim, at Gotham University they have an incredible piece of scientific equipment known as the Tunneling Electron Microscope.
Jason: Now, this microscope is so powerful that by firing electrons you can actually see images of the atom, the infinitesimally minute building blocks of our universe.
Jason: Tim, if I were using that microscope right now, I still wouldn’t be able to locate my interest in your problem.
To each his own…
Red Robin: *enters pass code*
Computer: ACCESS DENIED
Red Hood: Let me try mine.
Red Hood: *raises grenade launcher*
When your friends visit the Batcave for the first time (and are absolutely floored by it)…
Superboy: Can you see…
Robin: Yeah.
Beast Boy: Can you believe…
Robin: Yeah.
Impulse: Can we just…
Robin: No.
Telling your new girlfriend about the (Bat)family be like…
Tim: You know how every family has its secrets? Ours are a little different.
At Gotham Academy…
Tim: I’m Damian Wayne’s emergency contact.
Teacher: So, you’re here to pick him up?
Tim: I’m here to be removed as his emergency contact.
Tim: If you can, put Dick Grayson, he’s basically his second mother.
When Lex Luthor visits Wayne Enterprises and offers him a shady deal…
Tim Wayne, CEO: Well, the plot, unlike your hair, continues to thicken.
When you overstay your welcome at Red Hood’s safe house…
Jason: *hopping over mounds of bloody patrol suits and broken weapons while picking up dirty dishes*
Tim and Damian: *playing Injustice 2 on Xbox while yelling threats at each other*
Dick: *pouring milk on his cereal and spilling some on the carpet*
Jason: I don’t know when I became a dad to three lazy teenagers, but it stops today. You guys are cleaning this place up, top to bottom!
Dick: Hey, we don’t even live here!
Jason: Yes or no, do you have clothes in my laundry right now?
Dick [about Bruce]: “Clingy”? He called me “clingy”?
Tim: *nods*
Dick: Damn.
Dick: I’ve got to call him to make sure everything’s okay.
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