Batman: I have it on good authority that you’ve been posting these, quote-unquote, incorrect quotes about our family on this so-called… *narrows his eyes* Tumblr.
Me: *blinks*
Me: *shuddering slightly* Well, see, Mr. Batman, um,Sir Wayne, uh, Batwayne –
Nightwing: *gets up from his chair and hugs me tightly*
Me: Oh! Oh, okay. Wow. Thanks? So, um, do you have a question or… ?
Nightwing: *shakes his head and grins at me* I just wanted to lighten the mood. You know how our father tends to blur the line between an interview and an interrog–
Red Hood: *clears his throat loudly*
Red Hood: Why, um… Why the heck do you call me *reading something scribbled on his palm* “Big Brother of the Year”?
Me: Well, see, Jay, even though you see yourself as the “black sheep” of the family, I do believe that there’s some goodness in your heart and that you do care very much about them. I think Croc said it best: you’re a good kid trying to be bad, and – Are you okay?
Red Hood’s Helmet: – bZzt bzZt –
Me: Your helmet’s… There’s smoke coming out of your –
Red Hood: *gets up from his seat and speed-walks out of the room*
Me: Did I say something wrong?
Red Robin: No. His tears must’ve fried the circuits in his helmet. Anyway, is this where you live? *shows me a map on his tablet with coordinates to my residence*
Me: *wide-eyed* How’d you – ?
Red Robin: Don’t worry about it. Now, my real question is, is there a lot of coffee where you’re from?
Me: Well –
Red Robin: Like really strong cofee? *zooming in and out of the map* For some reason, I can’t get intel –
Robin: *shoves Tim out of the way*
Robin: Pretender! Where do you get the nerve –
Me: – to make you look adorable? Look, Dami, I can’t help it –
Black Bat: *grapple-hooks into the room and grabs me*
Spoiler: Alright, creeps, that’s enough blogger harrassment for today!
Batgirl: *whispering into my ear* I’m so sorry you had to go through this.
Alfred: *walks into the room*
Room: *falls silent*
Alfred: No dessert for all of you.
Everyone (including Bruce): *whines*
Alfred: As for you *looks at me*…
Me: *blinks*
Alfred: … we would appreciate it if you joined us for dinner. *walks out of the room with Batcow and Titus in tow*
The Signal: *turns off the camera and runs after Alfred* But I was just filming everything, I swear!
Catwoman: *comes in through the kitchen window* Meow. Did I miss the interview?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
I guess this is just my way of saying THANK YOU for your continued patronage.
Sincerely *with lots of cute, little hearts*,
a-wayne-at-heart/incorrect-batfamily-quotes
This is the best thing I have ever read in my life
Robin: *hissing*Will you two shut up? Father and Grayson might hear you!
Red Robin: What exactly are you trying to do?
Robin: *carrying@dc-comics-gal into the Batmobile* Trying to sneak them into the Manor! Obviously, Drake!
Red Hood: Well, not that I’d mind seeing the old Bat have a fit, but… why, kid?
Robin: One more question, Todd, and I swear –
Me: Hey, hey, hey! Put the Tumblr user down.
Me: Now, Damian.
Me:
Me: Okay, good.
Me: On our earth, we just say thank you.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
So, thank you!
It’s getting better and better and better 🙂 and I love it 💕
Damian: *shuts his bedroom door behind him*
Dick: Hey, Li’l D –
Dick:
Dick: Is there someone in your room?
Damian: No one! Nothing! None of your business! Now, get out of my way Grayson, I need to find Pennyworth! *rushes past him to the kitchen*
Dick: *slowly opens the door*
Jason: *showing @rosevered some of his favorite 18th century novels* Yo, Dames, you got the tea yet? We’re out –
Dick:
Jason:
Tim: *drops the stack of Xbox games he was carrying*
Dick:
Tim: Uhhh… Damian’s guest from… *looks to @rosevered* Which Earth did you say you were from again?
Dick:
Dick: *sits down beside them on the carpeted floor and offers to shake their hand* Another one of Robin’s stow-aways, huh? Welcome to the Manor, @rosevered .
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
No matter how many times I tell the Bats that a simple thank you would do, they just won’t listen, so I hope you don’t mind!
THIS I LOVE THIS! LIKE SO MUCH :D💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙
Batman: *working a long-overdue case on the Batcomputer*
Wonder Woman: *walking around the Batcave and admiring the mementos*
Wonder Woman:
Wonder Woman: *swiftly takes out her lasso and prepares to throw it*
Batman: *grabs the lasso in time* Diana, NO!
Wonder Woman: I sense a foreign presence in your cave, Bruce, lurking right behind that monstrous creature –
@nanna-the-batmum: *steps out from behind the dinosaur and into the light*
Wonder Woman: Great Hera…
Batman: They’re… They’re, uh…
Nightwing: *drops down from the ceiling* A guest from a nearby Earth. *winks at @nanna-the-batmum*
Superman: *flies in through the waterfall and dries himself off* Another one, Bruce?
Batman: Another what, Clark?
Robin: *enters with Batcow on a leash* I wonder the same thing, Father. Eight not enough for you?
Batman: Damian, are you implying –
Superman: *extends a hand to @nanna-the-batmum* Hello, I’m Superman. Welcome to our Earth.
Wonder Woman: *does the same* And I’m Diana of Themyscira. I hope you can forgive me for our earlier introduction.
Red Hood: *pulls his motorcycle to a screeching halt* Yo, @nanna-the-batmum, you one of us? Should we start training you?
Batman: *rubs his temples in frustration* Jason, nobody is training –
Red Robin: *parks his car beside Jason’s motorcycle* We could totally just pick you up at your place. Say, 9-ish? Also, don’t mind the tracker on your collar.
Batman: Tim – Hrrnnn. *goes back to work on the Batcomputer*
Alfred: *puts a hand on @nanna-the-batmum‘s shoulder* Clearly it requires quite a bit of energy to be in this family, so might I suggest you try some of the cookies I just baked? I hear they’re delicious. *leads the way to the kitchen*
Mother of bats…..
Yes good
It’s increased exponentially since last I saw it
If you’re still running this beautiful gift of a post, Harper Row is the best and I love catwoman and red hood so much too.
Selina: Look, @charismatic-hothead darlin’, this isn’t for the faint of heart. Even Bruce wasn’t up to the challenge.
Harper: You have to be totally, a-hundred-percent sure you’re up to this.
Officer Grayson: You have the right to take a break from your hectic schedule and have dinner at the Manor. Anything you do or say that’s equivalent to a “no” can and will be used against you in Alfred’s kitchen.
If you can’t afford a plane ticket to Gotham City, Bruce Wayne’ll provide it for you.
Officer Grayson: Do you understand the rights I have just read to you? With these rights in mind, care to have breakfast with me? I’ve got, like, six kinds of cereal. *grins and offers @chi-townbatgirl a blue-and-black striped hand*
Uhhhhhh i Love it 💜 can i get one with Dami and Alfred If you want to do it 💚
@hoshihime04: *trying to shift positions during a lovely nap but unable to move because of something really heavy…*
@hoshihime04: *eyelids fluttering… blinking… taking in nothing but darkness*
get up* At the young master’s behest, I’ve prepared crispy tofu tacos for the both of you. Now, off to the kitchen you go.
Batman: *stoically*“I can no other answer make, but, thanks, and thanks.”
Jason: Look, I know you’re you, but could you maybe not be you for a sec? This is Shakespeare, man! It’s supposed to be dramatic!
Batman: *with a gruff voice and a dramatic flip of the cape* “They do not love that do not show their love.”
Jason: We’re trying to help @kurara-black-blog in the words department, and possibly express our gratitude, so I don’t need you to be broody right now, Ba –
Red Hood: *chugs a can of beer, drops it to the ground, crushes it with his boot, kicks it to the curb, cocks his guns and sprays the can with bullets*
Red Hood: That’s what I think.
Red Hood: Of any form of disrespect towards your iconic icon.
Alfred: That’s enough, Master Jason! Now come inside for a snack. Bring @platinum-soul7 with you.
Red Hood: Oh, @&#+! Alfred’s cookies. Come on! *runs to the Manor*
It keep getting better and better
I can’t help but love it
*what a person finds when they need to study*
Nightwing: *playfully dangling his old Robin uniform on a blue-striped finger* So… You’re not coming with us, @insufferable-bastardz?
Robin: Not with that garbage of a suit, they’re not, Grayson.
Nightwing: *clutches his chest in mock pain* Right where it hurts, baby bro.
Robin: Also, @insufferable-bastardz has every right to be lame if they wanted to be, so. *shrugs and crosses his arms*
Red Robin: *pacing the room and working out an algorithm* Look, @insufferable-bastardz, I can totally hack into the system and change the schedule of any upcoming exam you have. And though I can hear the vessels in Bruce’s eyes pop as I say this, there’s always breaking and entering –
Nightwing: Which he himself does a lot by the way –
Red Hood: *kicks the door down* HEY.
Nightwing:
Red Robin:
Robin: -Tt-
Red Hood: *narrows his eyes at his brothers* If @insufferable-bastardz wants to study, they get to study.
Red Hood: *pulls out a chair and invitingly taps the one next to his* Let’s do this.
Holy masked riders batman! This is one of the few posts that make me happy by just reading it (hiya from mex)
Batman: *typing on the Batcomputer*
Batman: *snorts*
Batman: *clears his throat*
The Signal: Uh… Boss?
Batman: *grinning to himself*
Batman: *clears his throat again and frowns*
Batman: *chuckles*
Red Robin: Oookay there, Bruce?
Robin: -Tt- Father, what is wrong with –
Batman: *full-blown, guttural laughter*
Red Hood: That’s just… creepy.
Alfred: *runs into the cave, still wearing an apron and mittens* Master Bruce, what on earth –
Batman: *gleefully wiping tears from his eyes and rubbing his belly*
Nightwing: It really wasn’t that funny, Bruce.
Batman: @thedeafeningcollectionzombie… Your comment… Dick… *sighing contentedly* S-such awful jokes when he was Robin…
Red Robin: And Officer Grayson. And Agent 37 –
Batgirl: Then Nightwing again –
Spoiler: It kind of grows on you, actually –
Black Bat: *puts a comforting arm around one of Dick’s*
Batman: Just reminded me of the good old days.
Batman: *clears his throat and goes back to typing on the Batcomputer*
Nightwing: *laughs*Okay, okay. I appreciate you guys putting up with me.
Nightwing: And, @thedeafeningcollectionzombie – or Mex, is it? – hope you have a good laugh, too. *winks*
At 2am I should be sleeping – but why do that when I can read funny shit like this instead? (Sleep is for the weak anyway)
Alfred: Out! I said, out! *sweeping Tim out of @mattatatpat ’s living room with a broom*
Red Robin: *spilling a newly brewed pot of coffee all over his fire-proof uniform* But, Alf, I was just gonna –
Alfred: Absolutely not, Master Timothy!
Red Robin: – ask them if they wanted –
Alfred: Master Jason, the Batplane, now!
Red Hood [on the Comm Link]: On it, Alf! *muffled* Dam – *vague noises of a struggle* Gimme back the steering wheel – Kid, I promised the old man I wouldn’t let you – ARRRGH – *static*
Red Robin: *banging on the bedroom door* @mattatatpat ! I can’t sleep either! We should totally hang –
Nightwing: *climbs in through a window and tackles Tim to the ground* Sorry I’m late! *takes a patch from a breast pocket on his suit and slaps it onto Tim’s neck* Aaaand I’m sorry for that, little bro.
Nightwing: *carries an unconscious Tim out of the window and loads him into the Batplane with help from their bickering brothers*
Alfred: *throwing the last piece of coffee-soaked tissue into a bin* You must forgive our intrusion at such an hour.
Alfred: *gracefully climbing out of the window in his pristine Oxford shoes* And, @mattatatpat , sleep is for the wise. *winks at them as the Batplane door closes*
Batman: I have it on good authority that you’ve been posting these, quote-unquote, incorrect quotes about our family on this so-called… *narrows his eyes* Tumblr.
Me: *blinks*
Me: *shuddering slightly* Well, see, Mr. Batman, um,Sir Wayne, uh, Batwayne –
Nightwing: *gets up from his chair and hugs me tightly*
Me: Oh! Oh, okay. Wow. Thanks? So, um, do you have a question or… ?
Nightwing: *shakes his head and grins at me* I just wanted to lighten the mood. You know how our father tends to blur the line between an interview and an interrog–
Red Hood: *clears his throat loudly*
Red Hood: Why, um… Why the heck do you call me *reading something scribbled on his palm* “Big Brother of the Year”?
Me: Well, see, Jay, even though you see yourself as the “black sheep” of the family, I do believe that there’s some goodness in your heart and that you do care very much about them. I think Croc said it best: you’re a good kid trying to be bad, and – Are you okay?
Red Hood’s Helmet: – bZzt bzZt –
Me: Your helmet’s… There’s smoke coming out of your –
Red Hood: *gets up from his seat and speed-walks out of the room*
Me: Did I say something wrong?
Red Robin: No. His tears must’ve fried the circuits in his helmet. Anyway, is this where you live? *shows me a map on his tablet with coordinates to my residence*
Me: *wide-eyed* How’d you – ?
Red Robin: Don’t worry about it. Now, my real question is, is there a lot of coffee where you’re from?
Me: Well –
Red Robin: Like really strong cofee? *zooming in and out of the map* For some reason, I can’t get intel –
Robin: *shoves Tim out of the way*
Robin: Pretender! Where do you get the nerve –
Me: – to make you look adorable? Look, Dami, I can’t help it –
Black Bat: *grapple-hooks into the room and grabs me*
Spoiler: Alright, creeps, that’s enough blogger harrassment for today!
Batgirl: *whispering into my ear* I’m so sorry you had to go through this.
Alfred: *walks into the room*
Room: *falls silent*
Alfred: No dessert for all of you.
Everyone (including Bruce): *whines*
Alfred: As for you *looks at me*…
Me: *blinks*
Alfred: … we would appreciate it if you joined us for dinner. *walks out of the room with Batcow and Titus in tow*
The Signal: *turns off the camera and runs after Alfred* But I was just filming everything, I swear!
Catwoman: *comes in through the kitchen window* Meow. Did I miss the interview?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
I guess this is just my way of saying THANK YOU for your continued patronage.
Sincerely *with lots of cute, little hearts*,
a-wayne-at-heart/incorrect-batfamily-quotes
This is the best thing I have ever read in my life
Robin: *hissing*Will you two shut up? Father and Grayson might hear you!
Red Robin: What exactly are you trying to do?
Robin: *carrying@dc-comics-gal into the Batmobile* Trying to sneak them into the Manor! Obviously, Drake!
Red Hood: Well, not that I’d mind seeing the old Bat have a fit, but… why, kid?
Robin: One more question, Todd, and I swear –
Me: Hey, hey, hey! Put the Tumblr user down.
Me: Now, Damian.
Me:
Me: Okay, good.
Me: On our earth, we just say thank you.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
So, thank you!
It’s getting better and better and better 🙂 and I love it 💕
Damian: *shuts his bedroom door behind him*
Dick: Hey, Li’l D –
Dick:
Dick: Is there someone in your room?
Damian: No one! Nothing! None of your business! Now, get out of my way Grayson, I need to find Pennyworth! *rushes past him to the kitchen*
Dick: *slowly opens the door*
Jason: *showing @rosevered some of his favorite 18th century novels* Yo, Dames, you got the tea yet? We’re out –
Dick:
Jason:
Tim: *drops the stack of Xbox games he was carrying*
Dick:
Tim: Uhhh… Damian’s guest from… *looks to @rosevered* Which Earth did you say you were from again?
Dick:
Dick: *sits down beside them on the carpeted floor and offers to shake their hand* Another one of Robin’s stow-aways, huh? Welcome to the Manor, @rosevered .
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
No matter how many times I tell the Bats that a simple thank you would do, they just won’t listen, so I hope you don’t mind!
THIS I LOVE THIS! LIKE SO MUCH :D💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙
Batman: *working a long-overdue case on the Batcomputer*
Wonder Woman: *walking around the Batcave and admiring the mementos*
Wonder Woman:
Wonder Woman: *swiftly takes out her lasso and prepares to throw it*
Batman: *grabs the lasso in time* Diana, NO!
Wonder Woman: I sense a foreign presence in your cave, Bruce, lurking right behind that monstrous creature –
@nanna-the-batmum: *steps out from behind the dinosaur and into the light*
Wonder Woman: Great Hera…
Batman: They’re… They’re, uh…
Nightwing: *drops down from the ceiling* A guest from a nearby Earth. *winks at @nanna-the-batmum*
Superman: *flies in through the waterfall and dries himself off* Another one, Bruce?
Batman: Another what, Clark?
Robin: *enters with Batcow on a leash* I wonder the same thing, Father. Eight not enough for you?
Batman: Damian, are you implying –
Superman: *extends a hand to @nanna-the-batmum* Hello, I’m Superman. Welcome to our Earth.
Wonder Woman: *does the same* And I’m Diana of Themyscira. I hope you can forgive me for our earlier introduction.
Red Hood: *pulls his motorcycle to a screeching halt* Yo, @nanna-the-batmum, you one of us? Should we start training you?
Batman: *rubs his temples in frustration* Jason, nobody is training –
Red Robin: *parks his car beside Jason’s motorcycle* We could totally just pick you up at your place. Say, 9-ish? Also, don’t mind the tracker on your collar.
Batman: Tim – Hrrnnn. *goes back to work on the Batcomputer*
Alfred: *puts a hand on @nanna-the-batmum‘s shoulder* Clearly it requires quite a bit of energy to be in this family, so might I suggest you try some of the cookies I just baked? I hear they’re delicious. *leads the way to the kitchen*
Mother of bats…..
Yes good
It’s increased exponentially since last I saw it
If you’re still running this beautiful gift of a post, Harper Row is the best and I love catwoman and red hood so much too.
Selina: Look, @charismatic-hothead darlin’, this isn’t for the faint of heart. Even Bruce wasn’t up to the challenge.
Harper: You have to be totally, a-hundred-percent sure you’re up to this.
Officer Grayson: You have the right to take a break from your hectic schedule and have dinner at the Manor. Anything you do or say that’s equivalent to a “no” can and will be used against you in Alfred’s kitchen.
If you can’t afford a plane ticket to Gotham City, Bruce Wayne’ll provide it for you.
Officer Grayson: Do you understand the rights I have just read to you? With these rights in mind, care to have breakfast with me? I’ve got, like, six kinds of cereal. *grins and offers @chi-townbatgirl a blue-and-black striped hand*
Uhhhhhh i Love it 💜 can i get one with Dami and Alfred If you want to do it 💚
@hoshihime04: *trying to shift positions during a lovely nap but unable to move because of something really heavy…*
@hoshihime04: *eyelids fluttering… blinking… taking in nothing but darkness*
get up* At the young master’s behest, I’ve prepared crispy tofu tacos for the both of you. Now, off to the kitchen you go.
Batman: *stoically*“I can no other answer make, but, thanks, and thanks.”
Jason: Look, I know you’re you, but could you maybe not be you for a sec? This is Shakespeare, man! It’s supposed to be dramatic!
Batman: *with a gruff voice and a dramatic flip of the cape* “They do not love that do not show their love.”
Jason: We’re trying to help @kurara-black-blog in the words department, and possibly express our gratitude, so I don’t need you to be broody right now, Ba –
Red Hood: *chugs a can of beer, drops it to the ground, crushes it with his boot, kicks it to the curb, cocks his guns and sprays the can with bullets*
Red Hood: That’s what I think.
Red Hood: Of any form of disrespect towards your iconic icon.
Alfred: That’s enough, Master Jason! Now come inside for a snack. Bring @platinum-soul7 with you.
Red Hood: Oh, @&#+! Alfred’s cookies. Come on! *runs to the Manor*
It keep getting better and better
I can’t help but love it
*what a person finds when they need to study*
Nightwing: *playfully dangling his old Robin uniform on a blue-striped finger* So… You’re not coming with us, @insufferable-bastardz?
Robin: Not with that garbage of a suit, they’re not, Grayson.
Nightwing: *clutches his chest in mock pain* Right where it hurts, baby bro.
Robin: Also, @insufferable-bastardz has every right to be lame if they wanted to be, so. *shrugs and crosses his arms*
Red Robin: *pacing the room and working out an algorithm* Look, @insufferable-bastardz, I can totally hack into the system and change the schedule of any upcoming exam you have. And though I can hear the vessels in Bruce’s eyes pop as I say this, there’s always breaking and entering –
Nightwing: Which he himself does a lot by the way –
Red Hood: *kicks the door down* HEY.
Nightwing:
Red Robin:
Robin: -Tt-
Red Hood: *narrows his eyes at his brothers* If @insufferable-bastardz wants to study, they get to study.
Red Hood: *pulls out a chair and invitingly taps the one next to his* Let’s do this.
Holy masked riders batman! This is one of the few posts that make me happy by just reading it (hiya from mex)
Batman: *typing on the Batcomputer*
Batman: *snorts*
Batman: *clears his throat*
The Signal: Uh… Boss?
Batman: *grinning to himself*
Batman: *clears his throat again and frowns*
Batman: *chuckles*
Red Robin: Oookay there, Bruce?
Robin: -Tt- Father, what is wrong with –
Batman: *full-blown, guttural laughter*
Red Hood: That’s just… creepy.
Alfred: *runs into the cave, still wearing an apron and mittens* Master Bruce, what on earth –
Batman: *gleefully wiping tears from his eyes and rubbing his belly*
Nightwing: It really wasn’t that funny, Bruce.
Batman: @thedeafeningcollectionzombie… Your comment… Dick… *sighing contentedly* S-such awful jokes when he was Robin…
Red Robin: And Officer Grayson. And Agent 37 –
Batgirl: Then Nightwing again –
Spoiler: It kind of grows on you, actually –
Black Bat: *puts a comforting arm around one of Dick’s*
Batman: Just reminded me of the good old days.
Batman: *clears his throat and goes back to typing on the Batcomputer*
Nightwing: *laughs*Okay, okay. I appreciate you guys putting up with me.
Nightwing: And, @thedeafeningcollectionzombie – or Mex, is it? – hope you have a good laugh, too. *winks*
At 2am I should be sleeping – but why do that when I can read funny shit like this instead? (Sleep is for the weak anyway)
Alfred: Out! I said, out! *sweeping Tim out of @mattatatpat ’s living room with a broom*
Red Robin: *spilling a newly brewed pot of coffee all over his fire-proof uniform* But, Alf, I was just gonna –
Alfred: Absolutely not, Master Timothy!
Red Robin: – ask them if they wanted –
Alfred: Master Jason, the Batplane, now!
Red Hood [on the Comm Link]: On it, Alf! *muffled* Dam – *vague noises of a struggle* Gimme back the steering wheel – Kid, I promised the old man I wouldn’t let you – ARRRGH – *static*
Red Robin: *banging on the bedroom door* @mattatatpat ! I can’t sleep either! We should totally hang –
Nightwing: *climbs in through a window and tackles Tim to the ground* Sorry I’m late! *takes a patch from a breast pocket on his suit and slaps it onto Tim’s neck* Aaaand I’m sorry for that, little bro.
Nightwing: *carries an unconscious Tim out of the window and loads him into the Batplane with help from their bickering brothers*
Alfred: *throwing the last piece of coffee-soaked tissue into a bin* You must forgive our intrusion at such an hour.
Alfred: *gracefully climbing out of the window in his pristine Oxford shoes* And, @mattatatpat , sleep is for the wise. *winks at them as the Batplane door closes*
Batman: I have it on good authority that you’ve been posting these, quote-unquote, incorrect quotes about our family on this so-called… *narrows his eyes* Tumblr.
Me: *blinks*
Me: *shuddering slightly* Well, see, Mr. Batman, um,Sir Wayne, uh, Batwayne –
Nightwing: *gets up from his chair and hugs me tightly*
Me: Oh! Oh, okay. Wow. Thanks? So, um, do you have a question or… ?
Nightwing: *shakes his head and grins at me* I just wanted to lighten the mood. You know how our father tends to blur the line between an interview and an interrog–
Red Hood: *clears his throat loudly*
Red Hood: Why, um… Why the heck do you call me *reading something scribbled on his palm* “Big Brother of the Year”?
Me: Well, see, Jay, even though you see yourself as the “black sheep” of the family, I do believe that there’s some goodness in your heart and that you do care very much about them. I think Croc said it best: you’re a good kid trying to be bad, and – Are you okay?
Red Hood’s Helmet: – bZzt bzZt –
Me: Your helmet’s… There’s smoke coming out of your –
Red Hood: *gets up from his seat and speed-walks out of the room*
Me: Did I say something wrong?
Red Robin: No. His tears must’ve fried the circuits in his helmet. Anyway, is this where you live? *shows me a map on his tablet with coordinates to my residence*
Me: *wide-eyed* How’d you – ?
Red Robin: Don’t worry about it. Now, my real question is, is there a lot of coffee where you’re from?
Me: Well –
Red Robin: Like really strong cofee? *zooming in and out of the map* For some reason, I can’t get intel –
Robin: *shoves Tim out of the way*
Robin: Pretender! Where do you get the nerve –
Me: – to make you look adorable? Look, Dami, I can’t help it –
Black Bat: *grapple-hooks into the room and grabs me*
Spoiler: Alright, creeps, that’s enough blogger harrassment for today!
Batgirl: *whispering into my ear* I’m so sorry you had to go through this.
Alfred: *walks into the room*
Room: *falls silent*
Alfred: No dessert for all of you.
Everyone (including Bruce): *whines*
Alfred: As for you *looks at me*…
Me: *blinks*
Alfred: … we would appreciate it if you joined us for dinner. *walks out of the room with Batcow and Titus in tow*
The Signal: *turns off the camera and runs after Alfred* But I was just filming everything, I swear!
Catwoman: *comes in through the kitchen window* Meow. Did I miss the interview?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
I guess this is just my way of saying THANK YOU for your continued patronage.
Sincerely *with lots of cute, little hearts*,
a-wayne-at-heart/incorrect-batfamily-quotes
This is the best thing I have ever read in my life
Robin: *hissing*Will you two shut up? Father and Grayson might hear you!
Red Robin: What exactly are you trying to do?
Robin: *carrying@dc-comics-gal into the Batmobile* Trying to sneak them into the Manor! Obviously, Drake!
Red Hood: Well, not that I’d mind seeing the old Bat have a fit, but… why, kid?
Robin: One more question, Todd, and I swear –
Me: Hey, hey, hey! Put the Tumblr user down.
Me: Now, Damian.
Me:
Me: Okay, good.
Me: On our earth, we just say thank you.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
So, thank you!
It’s getting better and better and better 🙂 and I love it 💕
Damian: *shuts his bedroom door behind him*
Dick: Hey, Li’l D –
Dick:
Dick: Is there someone in your room?
Damian: No one! Nothing! None of your business! Now, get out of my way Grayson, I need to find Pennyworth! *rushes past him to the kitchen*
Dick: *slowly opens the door*
Jason: *showing @rosevered some of his favorite 18th century novels* Yo, Dames, you got the tea yet? We’re out –
Dick:
Jason:
Tim: *drops the stack of Xbox games he was carrying*
Dick:
Tim: Uhhh… Damian’s guest from… *looks to @rosevered* Which Earth did you say you were from again?
Dick:
Dick: *sits down beside them on the carpeted floor and offers to shake their hand* Another one of Robin’s stow-aways, huh? Welcome to the Manor, @rosevered .
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
No matter how many times I tell the Bats that a simple thank you would do, they just won’t listen, so I hope you don’t mind!
THIS I LOVE THIS! LIKE SO MUCH :D💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙
Batman: *working a long-overdue case on the Batcomputer*
Wonder Woman: *walking around the Batcave and admiring the mementos*
Wonder Woman:
Wonder Woman: *swiftly takes out her lasso and prepares to throw it*
Batman: *grabs the lasso in time* Diana, NO!
Wonder Woman: I sense a foreign presence in your cave, Bruce, lurking right behind that monstrous creature –
@nanna-the-batmum: *steps out from behind the dinosaur and into the light*
Wonder Woman: Great Hera…
Batman: They’re… They’re, uh…
Nightwing: *drops down from the ceiling* A guest from a nearby Earth. *winks at @nanna-the-batmum*
Superman: *flies in through the waterfall and dries himself off* Another one, Bruce?
Batman: Another what, Clark?
Robin: *enters with Batcow on a leash* I wonder the same thing, Father. Eight not enough for you?
Batman: Damian, are you implying –
Superman: *extends a hand to @nanna-the-batmum* Hello, I’m Superman. Welcome to our Earth.
Wonder Woman: *does the same* And I’m Diana of Themyscira. I hope you can forgive me for our earlier introduction.
Red Hood: *pulls his motorcycle to a screeching halt* Yo, @nanna-the-batmum, you one of us? Should we start training you?
Batman: *rubs his temples in frustration* Jason, nobody is training –
Red Robin: *parks his car beside Jason’s motorcycle* We could totally just pick you up at your place. Say, 9-ish? Also, don’t mind the tracker on your collar.
Batman: Tim – Hrrnnn. *goes back to work on the Batcomputer*
Alfred: *puts a hand on @nanna-the-batmum‘s shoulder* Clearly it requires quite a bit of energy to be in this family, so might I suggest you try some of the cookies I just baked? I hear they’re delicious. *leads the way to the kitchen*
Mother of bats…..
Yes good
It’s increased exponentially since last I saw it
If you’re still running this beautiful gift of a post, Harper Row is the best and I love catwoman and red hood so much too.
Selina: Look, @charismatic-hothead darlin’, this isn’t for the faint of heart. Even Bruce wasn’t up to the challenge.
Harper: You have to be totally, a-hundred-percent sure you’re up to this.
Officer Grayson: You have the right to take a break from your hectic schedule and have dinner at the Manor. Anything you do or say that’s equivalent to a “no” can and will be used against you in Alfred’s kitchen.
If you can’t afford a plane ticket to Gotham City, Bruce Wayne’ll provide it for you.
Officer Grayson: Do you understand the rights I have just read to you? With these rights in mind, care to have breakfast with me? I’ve got, like, six kinds of cereal. *grins and offers @chi-townbatgirl a blue-and-black striped hand*
Uhhhhhh i Love it 💜 can i get one with Dami and Alfred If you want to do it 💚
@hoshihime04: *trying to shift positions during a lovely nap but unable to move because of something really heavy…*
@hoshihime04: *eyelids fluttering… blinking… taking in nothing but darkness*
get up* At the young master’s behest, I’ve prepared crispy tofu tacos for the both of you. Now, off to the kitchen you go.
Batman: *stoically*“I can no other answer make, but, thanks, and thanks.”
Jason: Look, I know you’re you, but could you maybe not be you for a sec? This is Shakespeare, man! It’s supposed to be dramatic!
Batman: *with a gruff voice and a dramatic flip of the cape* “They do not love that do not show their love.”
Jason: We’re trying to help @kurara-black-blog in the words department, and possibly express our gratitude, so I don’t need you to be broody right now, Ba –
Red Hood: *chugs a can of beer, drops it to the ground, crushes it with his boot, kicks it to the curb, cocks his guns and sprays the can with bullets*
Red Hood: That’s what I think.
Red Hood: Of any form of disrespect towards your iconic icon.
Alfred: That’s enough, Master Jason! Now come inside for a snack. Bring @platinum-soul7 with you.
Red Hood: Oh, @&#+! Alfred’s cookies. Come on! *runs to the Manor*
It keep getting better and better
I can’t help but love it
*what a person finds when they need to study*
Nightwing: *playfully dangling his old Robin uniform on a blue-striped finger* So… You’re not coming with us, @insufferable-bastardz?
Robin: Not with that garbage of a suit, they’re not, Grayson.
Nightwing: *clutches his chest in mock pain* Right where it hurts, baby bro.
Robin: Also, @insufferable-bastardz has every right to be lame if they wanted to be, so. *shrugs and crosses his arms*
Red Robin: *pacing the room and working out an algorithm* Look, @insufferable-bastardz, I can totally hack into the system and change the schedule of any upcoming exam you have. And though I can hear the vessels in Bruce’s eyes pop as I say this, there’s always breaking and entering –
Nightwing: Which he himself does a lot by the way –
Red Hood: *kicks the door down* HEY.
Nightwing:
Red Robin:
Robin: -Tt-
Red Hood: *narrows his eyes at his brothers* If @insufferable-bastardz wants to study, they get to study.
Red Hood: *pulls out a chair and invitingly taps the one next to his* Let’s do this.
Holy masked riders batman! This is one of the few posts that make me happy by just reading it (hiya from mex)
Batman: *typing on the Batcomputer*
Batman: *snorts*
Batman: *clears his throat*
The Signal: Uh… Boss?
Batman: *grinning to himself*
Batman: *clears his throat again and frowns*
Batman: *chuckles*
Red Robin: Oookay there, Bruce?
Robin: -Tt- Father, what is wrong with –
Batman: *full-blown, guttural laughter*
Red Hood: That’s just… creepy.
Alfred: *runs into the cave, still wearing an apron and mittens* Master Bruce, what on earth –
Batman: *gleefully wiping tears from his eyes and rubbing his belly*
Nightwing: It really wasn’t that funny, Bruce.
Batman: @thedeafeningcollectionzombie … Your comment… Dick… *sighing contentedly* S-such awful jokes when he was Robin…
Red Robin: And Officer Grayson. And Agent 37 –
Batgirl: Then Nightwing again –
Spoiler: It kind of grows on you, actually –
Black Bat: *puts a comforting arm around one of Dick’s*
Batman: Just reminded me of the good old days.
Batman: *clears his throat and goes back to typing on the Batcomputer*
Nightwing: *laughs*Okay, okay. I appreciate you guys putting up with me.
Nightwing: And, @thedeafeningcollectionzombie – or Mex, is it? – hope you have a good laugh, too. *winks*
I love all of these! If you’re still doing it (which you’re probably not) I love Damian and Tim.
💚💚💚
I still remember squealing the first time I read this, thanks!!
Red Robin: … And I couldn’t sleep for, like, eight days.
Superboy: Uh, newsflash: that’s not unusual.
Red Robin: No! I mean, yeah, okay, but this time it wasn’t caffeine or anxiety. It was blood-curdling, Kon. And I live with Damian Wayne.
Superboy: Don’t you think I would’ve heard it then?
Red Robin: Maybe, maybe not? It’s not really – See, it’s –
Red Robin: I trust you with my life. You know that, right?
Superboy: Duh. What’s your point?
Red Robin: *sighs*
Red Robin: Come with me.
Red Robin: *proceeds to lead Conner through a maze of secret passageways throughout the Manor to a steel door*
Red Robin: *takes a prosthetic eyeball out of his utility belt – *
Superboy: Gross, dude!
Red Robin: * – and presents it to a retinal scanner*
1-tonne Door: *slowly opens to reveal a bunch of really awesome, secret stuff that shall not be mentioned here*
Superboy: Woooooooo–
Red Robin: The Bat doesn’t know about this.
Superboy: –aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh–
Robin: *hissing* Will you two idiots shut up?
Red Robin and Superboy: WHAAA!!!
Robin: *jumps down from a dark corner of the ceiling and dusts himself off*
Red Robin: What are you doing here, brat?!
Robin: Drake, did you seriously think that you were the only Robin smart enough to figure this place out?
Superboy: Figure what out exactly… ?
Red Robin: Yeah, congrats, kid, but this is important, so why don’t you go find Kon’s little brother and play outside or someth– *patting one of his utility belt compartments*
Robin: *holding up a prosthetic finger* Looking for this?
Superboy: What is it with your family?!
Red Robin: *rolls his eyes and crosses his arms* Just do it. Show off.
Robin: *places the “finger” against a scanner which activates an alien-looking computer*
Superboy: What is THIS?
Red Robin: Inter-Earth communicator. Underground Wayne Tech.
Superboy: Awessooooooo–
Robin: If anyone finds out about this, Kent, I’ll make sure you wake up in an awesome tub full of Krypton–
Red Robin: Okay, that’s enough, short stuff. They’re on.
Superboy: *watching as two faces slowly come into view on separate panels on screen* They… ?
Robin: Superboy, meet @little-shadowgirl, a worthy admirer, though I fail to understand what they see in Red –
Red Robin: *clears his throat* And @dc-comics-gal, the source of the squeal that woke up me better than any cup of coffee could.
I love that this post just grows and I love it.
Superboy: *spins around in panic* AH! Who said that?!
Robin: *covers Conner’s mouth and silences him with a warning look*
Red Robin: *shutting down the IEC (see previous post) and grabbing hold of his bo staff * Oookay… We’re supposed to be the only ones here.
Red Hood: *coming out of a dark corner* That’s what she – *misses a sword hurled at his face by exactly three millimeters, horrified* What the – KID!
Robin: -Tt-
Red Robin: *facepalms* In his defense, Jay, you had that coming. So you know about this place, too, huh?
Red Hood: *scoffs* How dumb does Bruce think we are?
Red Robin: *shrugs* Maybe he’s been watching us the whole time –
Robin: Perhaps this was Father’s plan all along –
Superboy: WHAT? No, no, no, no, man. I shouldn’t be here. I won’t hear the end of it from Supes if he finds out about this from your dad, of all people!
Red Robin: *slaps Conner on the chest, regrets it immediately and groans internally* Kon, dude, relax. We, like, do stuff like this to Batman all the time.
Superboy: And you actually get away with it?
Red Robin: *looks to Jason*
Red Hood: *looks to Damian*
Robin: -Tt-
Red Robin: Anyway. What were you saying, Jay?
Red Hood: Uhhh…
Superboy: Right before you gave me that Kryptonian heart attack, dude!
Red Hood: First of all, I’m not your dude, and secondly –
Nightwing: *holding @local-witch-of-mn by the arm* Were you looking for them?
Red Hood, Robin and Superboy: AHHHH!!!
Robin: I underestimated your stealth, Grayson –
Nightwing: Uh, guys, you left the gigantic steel door wide open –
Batman: I have it on good authority that you’ve been posting these, quote-unquote, incorrect quotes about our family on this so-called… *narrows his eyes* Tumblr.
Me: *blinks*
Me: *shuddering slightly* Well, see, Mr. Batman, um,Sir Wayne, uh, Batwayne –
Nightwing: *gets up from his chair and hugs me tightly*
Me: Oh! Oh, okay. Wow. Thanks? So, um, do you have a question or… ?
Nightwing: *shakes his head and grins at me* I just wanted to lighten the mood. You know how our father tends to blur the line between an interview and an interrog–
Red Hood: *clears his throat loudly*
Red Hood: Why, um… Why the heck do you call me *reading something scribbled on his palm* “Big Brother of the Year”?
Me: Well, see, Jay, even though you see yourself as the “black sheep” of the family, I do believe that there’s some goodness in your heart and that you do care very much about them. I think Croc said it best: you’re a good kid trying to be bad, and – Are you okay?
Red Hood’s Helmet: – bZzt bzZt –
Me: Your helmet’s… There’s smoke coming out of your –
Red Hood: *gets up from his seat and speed-walks out of the room*
Me: Did I say something wrong?
Red Robin: No. His tears must’ve fried the circuits in his helmet. Anyway, is this where you live? *shows me a map on his tablet with coordinates to my residence*
Me: *wide-eyed* How’d you – ?
Red Robin: Don’t worry about it. Now, my real question is, is there a lot of coffee where you’re from?
Me: Well –
Red Robin: Like really strong cofee? *zooming in and out of the map* For some reason, I can’t get intel –
Robin: *shoves Tim out of the way*
Robin: Pretender! Where do you get the nerve –
Me: – to make you look adorable? Look, Dami, I can’t help it –
Black Bat: *grapple-hooks into the room and grabs me*
Spoiler: Alright, creeps, that’s enough blogger harrassment for today!
Batgirl: *whispering into my ear* I’m so sorry you had to go through this.
Alfred: *walks into the room*
Room: *falls silent*
Alfred: No dessert for all of you.
Everyone (including Bruce): *whines*
Alfred: As for you *looks at me*…
Me: *blinks*
Alfred: … we would appreciate it if you joined us for dinner. *walks out of the room with Batcow and Titus in tow*
The Signal: *turns off the camera and runs after Alfred* But I was just filming everything, I swear!
Catwoman: *comes in through the kitchen window* Meow. Did I miss the interview?
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
I guess this is just my way of saying THANK YOU for your continued patronage.
Sincerely *with lots of cute, little hearts*,
a-wayne-at-heart/incorrect-batfamily-quotes
This is the best thing I have ever read in my life
Robin: *hissing*Will you two shut up? Father and Grayson might hear you!
Red Robin: What exactly are you trying to do?
Robin: *carrying@dc-comics-gal into the Batmobile* Trying to sneak them into the Manor! Obviously, Drake!
Red Hood: Well, not that I’d mind seeing the old Bat have a fit, but… why, kid?
Robin: One more question, Todd, and I swear –
Me: Hey, hey, hey! Put the Tumblr user down.
Me: Now, Damian.
Me:
Me: Okay, good.
Me: On our earth, we just say thank you.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
So, thank you!
It’s getting better and better and better 🙂 and I love it 💕
Damian: *shuts his bedroom door behind him*
Dick: Hey, Li’l D –
Dick:
Dick: Is there someone in your room?
Damian: No one! Nothing! None of your business! Now, get out of my way Grayson, I need to find Pennyworth! *rushes past him to the kitchen*
Dick: *slowly opens the door*
Jason: *showing @rosevered some of his favorite 18th century novels* Yo, Dames, you got the tea yet? We’re out –
Dick:
Jason:
Tim: *drops the stack of Xbox games he was carrying*
Dick:
Tim: Uhhh… Damian’s guest from… *looks to @rosevered* Which Earth did you say you were from again?
Dick:
Dick: *sits down beside them on the carpeted floor and offers to shake their hand* Another one of Robin’s stow-aways, huh? Welcome to the Manor, @rosevered .
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
No matter how many times I tell the Bats that a simple thank you would do, they just won’t listen, so I hope you don’t mind!
THIS I LOVE THIS! LIKE SO MUCH :D💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙❤💙
Batman: *working a long-overdue case on the Batcomputer*
Wonder Woman: *walking around the Batcave and admiring the mementos*
Wonder Woman:
Wonder Woman: *swiftly takes out her lasso and prepares to throw it*
Batman: *grabs the lasso in time* Diana, NO!
Wonder Woman: I sense a foreign presence in your cave, Bruce, lurking right behind that monstrous creature –
@nanna-the-batmum: *steps out from behind the dinosaur and into the light*
Wonder Woman: Great Hera…
Batman: They’re… They’re, uh…
Nightwing: *drops down from the ceiling* A guest from a nearby Earth. *winks at @nanna-the-batmum*
Superman: *flies in through the waterfall and dries himself off* Another one, Bruce?
Batman: Another what, Clark?
Robin: *enters with Batcow on a leash* I wonder the same thing, Father. Eight not enough for you?
Batman: Damian, are you implying –
Superman: *extends a hand to @nanna-the-batmum* Hello, I’m Superman. Welcome to our Earth.
Wonder Woman: *does the same* And I’m Diana of Themyscira. I hope you can forgive me for our earlier introduction.
Red Hood: *pulls his motorcycle to a screeching halt* Yo, @nanna-the-batmum, you one of us? Should we start training you?
Batman: *rubs his temples in frustration* Jason, nobody is training –
Red Robin: *parks his car beside Jason’s motorcycle* We could totally just pick you up at your place. Say, 9-ish? Also, don’t mind the tracker on your collar.
Batman: Tim – Hrrnnn. *goes back to work on the Batcomputer*
Alfred: *puts a hand on @nanna-the-batmum‘s shoulder* Clearly it requires quite a bit of energy to be in this family, so might I suggest you try some of the cookies I just baked? I hear they’re delicious. *leads the way to the kitchen*
Mother of bats…..
Yes good
It’s increased exponentially since last I saw it
If you’re still running this beautiful gift of a post, Harper Row is the best and I love catwoman and red hood so much too.
Selina: Look, @charismatic-hothead darlin’, this isn’t for the faint of heart. Even Bruce wasn’t up to the challenge.
Harper: You have to be totally, a-hundred-percent sure you’re up to this.
Officer Grayson: You have the right to take a break from your hectic schedule and have dinner at the Manor. Anything you do or say that’s equivalent to a “no” can and will be used against you in Alfred’s kitchen.
If you can’t afford a plane ticket to Gotham City, Bruce Wayne’ll provide it for you.
Officer Grayson: Do you understand the rights I have just read to you? With these rights in mind, care to have breakfast with me? I’ve got, like, six kinds of cereal. *grins and offers @chi-townbatgirl a blue-and-black striped hand*
Uhhhhhh i Love it 💜 can i get one with Dami and Alfred If you want to do it 💚
@hoshihime04: *trying to shift positions during a lovely nap but unable to move because of something really heavy…*
@hoshihime04: *eyelids fluttering… blinking… taking in nothing but darkness*
get up* At the young master’s behest, I’ve prepared crispy tofu tacos for the both of you. Now, off to the kitchen you go.
Batman: *stoically*“I can no other answer make, but, thanks, and thanks.”
Jason: Look, I know you’re you, but could you maybe not be you for a sec? This is Shakespeare, man! It’s supposed to be dramatic!
Batman: *with a gruff voice and a dramatic flip of the cape* “They do not love that do not show their love.”
Jason: We’re trying to help @kurara-black-blog in the words department, and possibly express our gratitude, so I don’t need you to be broody right now, Ba –
Red Hood: *chugs a can of beer, drops it to the ground, crushes it with his boot, kicks it to the curb, cocks his guns and sprays the can with bullets*
Red Hood: That’s what I think.
Red Hood: Of any form of disrespect towards your iconic icon.
Alfred: That’s enough, Master Jason! Now come inside for a snack. Bring @platinum-soul7 with you.
Red Hood: Oh, @&#+! Alfred’s cookies. Come on! *runs to the Manor*
It keep getting better and better
I can’t help but love it
*what a person finds when they need to study*
Nightwing: *playfully dangling his old Robin uniform on a blue-striped finger* So… You’re not coming with us, @insufferable-bastardz?
Robin: Not with that garbage of a suit, they’re not, Grayson.
Nightwing: *clutches his chest in mock pain* Right where it hurts, baby bro.
Robin: Also, @insufferable-bastardz has every right to be lame if they wanted to be, so. *shrugs and crosses his arms*
Red Robin: *pacing the room and working out an algorithm* Look, @insufferable-bastardz, I can totally hack into the system and change the schedule of any upcoming exam you have. And though I can hear the vessels in Bruce’s eyes pop as I say this, there’s always breaking and entering –
Nightwing: Which he himself does a lot by the way –
Red Hood: *kicks the door down* HEY.
Nightwing:
Red Robin:
Robin: -Tt-
Red Hood: *narrows his eyes at his brothers* If @insufferable-bastardz wants to study, they get to study.
Red Hood: *pulls out a chair and invitingly taps the one next to his* Let’s do this.
Holy masked riders batman! This is one of the few posts that make me happy by just reading it (hiya from mex)
Batman: *typing on the Batcomputer*
Batman: *snorts*
Batman: *clears his throat*
The Signal: Uh… Boss?
Batman: *grinning to himself*
Batman: *clears his throat again and frowns*
Batman: *chuckles*
Red Robin: Oookay there, Bruce?
Robin: -Tt- Father, what is wrong with –
Batman: *full-blown, guttural laughter*
Red Hood: That’s just… creepy.
Alfred: *runs into the cave, still wearing an apron and mittens* Master Bruce, what on earth –
Batman: *gleefully wiping tears from his eyes and rubbing his belly*
Nightwing: It really wasn’t that funny, Bruce.
Batman: @thedeafeningcollectionzombie … Your comment… Dick… *sighing contentedly* S-such awful jokes when he was Robin…
Red Robin: And Officer Grayson. And Agent 37 –
Batgirl: Then Nightwing again –
Spoiler: It kind of grows on you, actually –
Black Bat: *puts a comforting arm around one of Dick’s*
Batman: Just reminded me of the good old days.
Batman: *clears his throat and goes back to typing on the Batcomputer*
Nightwing: *laughs*Okay, okay. I appreciate you guys putting up with me.
Nightwing: And, @thedeafeningcollectionzombie – or Mex, is it? – hope you have a good laugh, too. *winks*
I love all of these! If you’re still doing it (which you’re probably not) I love Damian and Tim.
💚💚💚
I still remember squealing the first time I read this, thanks!!
Red Robin: … And I couldn’t sleep for, like, eight days.
Superboy: Uh, newsflash: that’s not unusual.
Red Robin: No! I mean, yeah, okay, but this time it wasn’t caffeine or anxiety. It was blood-curdling, Kon. And I live with Damian Wayne.
Superboy: Don’t you think I would’ve heard it then?
Red Robin: Maybe, maybe not? It’s not really – See, it’s –
Red Robin: I trust you with my life. You know that, right?
Superboy: Duh. What’s your point?
Red Robin: *sighs*
Red Robin: Come with me.
Red Robin: *proceeds to lead Conner through a maze of secret passageways throughout the Manor to a steel door*
Red Robin: *takes a prosthetic eyeball out of his utility belt – *
Superboy: Gross, dude!
Red Robin: * – and presents it to a retinal scanner*
1-tonne Door: *slowly opens to reveal a bunch of really awesome, secret stuff that shall not be mentioned here*
Superboy: Woooooooo–
Red Robin: The Bat doesn’t know about this.
Superboy: –aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh–
Robin: *hissing* Will you two idiots shut up?
Red Robin and Superboy: WHAAA!!!
Robin: *jumps down from a dark corner of the ceiling and dusts himself off*
Red Robin: What are you doing here, brat?!
Robin: Drake, did you seriously think that you were the only Robin smart enough to figure this place out?
Superboy: Figure what out exactly… ?
Red Robin: Yeah, congrats, kid, but this is important, so why don’t you go find Kon’s little brother and play outside or someth– *patting one of his utility belt compartments*
Robin: *holding up a prosthetic finger* Looking for this?
Superboy: What is it with your family?!
Red Robin: *rolls his eyes and crosses his arms* Just do it. Show off.
Robin: *places the “finger” against a scanner which activates an alien-looking computer*
Superboy: What is THIS?
Red Robin: Inter-Earth communicator. Underground Wayne Tech.
Superboy: Awessooooooo–
Robin: If anyone finds out about this, Kent, I’ll make sure you wake up in an awesome tub full of Krypton–
Red Robin: Okay, that’s enough, short stuff. They’re on.
Superboy: *watching as two faces slowly come into view on separate panels on screen* They… ?
Robin: Superboy, meet @little-shadowgirl, a worthy admirer, though I fail to understand what they see in Red –
Red Robin: *clears his throat* And @dc-comics-gal, the source of the squeal that woke up me better than any cup of coffee could.
I love that this post just grows and I love it.
Superboy: *spins around in panic* AH! Who said that?!
Robin: *covers Conner’s mouth and silences him with a warning look*
Red Robin: *shutting down the IEC (see previous post) and grabbing hold of his bo staff * Oookay… We’re supposed to be the only ones here.
Red Hood: *coming out of a dark corner* That’s what she – *misses a sword hurled at his face by exactly three millimeters, horrified* What the – KID!
Robin: -Tt-
Red Robin: *facepalms* In his defense, Jay, you had that coming. So you know about this place, too, huh?
Red Hood: *scoffs* How dumb does Bruce think we are?
Red Robin: *shrugs* Maybe he’s been watching us the whole time –
Robin: Perhaps this was Father’s plan all along –
Superboy: WHAT? No, no, no, no, man. I shouldn’t be here. I won’t hear the end of it from Supes if he finds out about this from your dad, of all people!
Red Robin: *slaps Conner on the chest, regrets it immediately and groans internally* Kon, dude, relax. We, like, do stuff like this to Batman all the time.
Superboy: And you actually get away with it?
Red Robin: *looks to Jason*
Red Hood: *looks to Damian*
Robin: -Tt-
Red Robin: Anyway. What were you saying, Jay?
Red Hood: Uhhh…
Superboy: Right before you gave me that Kryptonian heart attack, dude!
Red Hood: First of all, I’m not your dude, and secondly –
Nightwing: *holding @local-witch-of-mn by the arm* Were you looking for them?
Red Hood, Robin and Superboy: AHHHH!!!
Robin: I underestimated your stealth, Grayson –
Nightwing: Uh, guys, you left the gigantic steel door wide open –
When Batman (inexplicably) asks Hellblazer to watch over his sons while he’s away on a mission…
Nightwing: *comes in through the front door of the Manor*
Hellblazer: Ah, the Golden Boy has returned. Release the doves!
Nightwing:Hi, Mr. Constantine.
Red Hood: *breaks a window in the foyer and climbs in*
Hellblazer:And you must be the second Robin. I have been thoroughly briefed on you and if you do one thing wrong, I’m going to go medieval on your arse.
When Batman (inexplicably) asks Hellblazer to watch over his sons while he’s away on a mission…
Nightwing: *comes in through the front door of the Manor*
Hellblazer: Ah, the Golden Boy has returned. Release the doves!
Nightwing:Hi, Mr. Constantine.
Red Hood: *breaks a window in the foyer and climbs in*
Hellblazer:And you must be the second Robin. I have been thoroughly briefed on you and if you do one thing wrong, I’m going to go medieval on your arse.
Red Hood: *leans on a wall and slides down into a cross-legged, sitting position*
Red Hood: *checks his watch, sighs, puts down his binoculars and taps a foot impatiently against the rooftop floor*
Red Hood: *takes out his phone, opens incorrect-batfamily-quotes on Tumblr and scrolls through the “big brother of the year” tag*
Red Hood: *chuckles* I would totally do that. *browses* Yup, Timbo needs to sleep. *checks out the comments* That’s… nice. *looks to the sky as if he could use it to talk to someone from another Earth* Thanks… whoever you are. *scrunches his nose* And apparently… there’s a lot of you who think that I’m not too bad…
Red Hood: *gets up in a half a second flat, guns drawn*
Red Robin: *holding his hands up in surrender* Relax, relax. It’s just me.
Black Bat: *soundlessly stepping out of a dark corner* And me.
Nightwing: *hanging upside down and covering the eyeholes on Jason’s helmet* Aaaaand your favorite older brother.
Red Hood: *peeling Dick’s blue-striped fingers off* Look, I don’t give a bat’s butt what the old man said, I’m taking this case –
Robin: *jumps down from behind a gargoyle and throws his hands up in frustration* What took you so long, Todd?! This whole day has been wasted waiting for you!
Red Hood: – gonna freakin’ bring down those lowlives who took Kori no matter what it – Wait, wait. What exactly is going on here?
Nightwing: *smiling excitedly* There is no case, Little Wing.
Red Hood: I don’t –
Spoiler: *swings in from a nearby rooftop*Is he here?Did he buy –Oh, hey, Jay! Starfire’s giggling her orange-y, little head off watching you right now. *points to a hidden camera in a crevice*
Red Hood: WHAT? But the leads –
Red Robin: Were made up. I hacked into your personal satellite. Sent some signals here and there, bada-bing-bada-boom.
Red Hood: How is all this even – I can’t – How’d you guys get past me?
Batgirl: *rappelling from the Batjet with Duke* Because we helped them, duh. It was the only way to get you to come here today.
Red Hood: *takes his helmet off and rubs his face in utter confusion* I followed those leads for three weeks! I mean, Artemis and Bizarro –
Artemis: *lands on the rooftop on Bizarro’s back, shrugs and hands her sword to Damian, who greedily grabs it* Just pretended to be pissed that you had to leave for your “mission”.
Bizarro: We not sad Red Him gone!
The Signal: So does he mean he was or… ?
Red Hood: If this is some kind of *doing air-quotation marks* intervention, you tell that arrogant, self-righteous, emotionally –
Batman: – inept, leather-clad furry that it won’t work.
Red Hood:
Batman: I’d like to give it a try anyway.
Red Hood: But we… we’re supposed to… we hate each other…
Batman: *grins and ruffles Jason’s hair* Hn. Don’t believe everything you read, kid.
Red Hood: *grins sheepishly back*
The Signal: *looks around for secret passageways on the rooftop and whispers to Tim* Where’d the boss even come from?
Alfred [on the Comm Link]: *clears his throat loudly* If you’re all quite finished, the rest of your family and friends – *muffled* Mr. Harper, once again, that vase is a family heirloom and was never intended for target practice – are waiting.
Batman: Let’s get you home.
Red Hood: Right. I’m starving.
Alfred: Please do hurry up. The candles can only stay up for so long.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 