Remember Nightwing’s pregnancy scare?
Jason [to Dick]: I know that you’ll be a good father, Dick. A really good one. Because you’re tough, and you’re kind, and you’re smart.
Jason: And if you tell anyone that I said that, I will deny it.
Tag: big brother of the year
Red Hood: *dramatically spray-painting the words “I died” in cursive on the sidewalk next to a group of bound criminals*
Red Robin: *waiting for him to finish so they could report back to Batman* Are you done feeling sorry for yourself?
Red Hood: Personally, I’d like another ten to fifteen minutes of really pathetic self-indulgence.
Red Robin: *referring to Damian’s sword* Drop it, brat.
Robin: *tightening his grip* Can’t do that, Drake.
Red Hood: Guys, guys, guys, guys. Let’s just, let’s just take a minute here. Remember, we’re a family –
Red Robin and Robin: Stay in the car!
Red Hood: Technically, I still have one foot in the car –
Red Robin: I’m actually an excellent hacker.
Red Hood: And I’m excellent in the field, so…
Red Robin: Maybe at Batman, Inc., but on Batman, Inc. missions you had big dossiers with all the information you could possibly need.
Red Hood: Yeah, but I never read them.
Dick: *won’t stop making puns during family dinner*
Jason: *puts his utensils down, wipes his mouth with a napkin, sighs, and looks his older brother in the eye*
Jason: Everything you just said makes me want to give you a wedgie in front of the others.
Red Robin: Did Nightwing and Red Hood turn off their mics?
Robin: I did. Those two gab like little school girls on the field. It’s murder on the ears.
Crashing at Red Robin’s Nest…
Jason: *places pillows on the couch*
Tim: Don’t sleep there. You can use the bedroom.
Jason: I can’t take your bedroom.
Tim: I’m up at four o’clock in the morning.
Jason: I can’t kick you out of your bed.
Tim: I don’t even sleep.
Few things scare a Robin who’s already died…
Jason: *clutches at chest* You scared me!
Damian: *climbs down from ceiling*
Damian: It’s just me.
Jason: That’s enough!
… and one’s another Robin who has, too.
The Robins as…
CORPORATE EMPLOYEES
Dick
- Human Resources Head
- Requires all employees to regularly attend team building/group therapy sessions, many of which he himself leads (though most don’t feel “obligated” to because they actually like him and his programs)
- Spends majority of his time at work mediating between his brothers, honestly
Jason
- Chief Security Officer
- One of the main reasons the entire company can sleep soundly at night
- He’s thought of everything – from shatterproof glass windows to extensive financial protection strategies to protocols to take down shady bystanders dressed as clowns to –
Tim
- Chief Executive Officer
- Deserves an award for putting up with a certain member of the Board of Directors, who he reports to
- Would rather stay cooped up in his office, working overtime, than travel abroad or go golfing with other executives (and his personal assistant deserves an award for the daily number of “coffee runs” done in his behalf)
Damian
- member of the Board of Directors (alongside Bruce, who, in spite of constantly having to deal with headaches caused by arguing with his youngest son, cannot deny the teenager’s business acumen)
- “You were saying?”, he says as he glowers at another member who’s clearly perturbed by the cow standing beside him at the head of the conference table
Nightwing: *watches as Jason hits the pavement after being flung across the sky by Artemis*
Nightwing: *helping him up* You okay? You really had me worried.
Red Hood: I’m so embarrassed. I can’t even get my ass kicked with any dignity.
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