Commercial on TV: *in a sexy, masculine voice* “Easy, Breezy, Adorable – Cover Boy” *winks at the camera*
Roy: *snorts*
Wally: *covering his mouth to stifle his giggling*
Garth: "Wow, Grayson… You could sell water to me and I’d totally buy it.“
Roy and Wally: *break out into belly laughter*
Dick: *places the pizza box on the coffee table and switches the channel* "Ha ha, very funny. I’m undercover, remember?”
Donna: *grabs a pizza and nods in mock seriousness* “Oh, we know, UnderCover Boy.” *winks*
~ * ~ * ~ * ~
JASON:
Chiseled features? Ooooh, ✔. Previous modeling experience as a villain pretending to be Nightwing (in canon)?
✔. Also linked to a Tamaranian super model?
✔ (But they’re “just friends, okay?”).
Discovered by an agent while trying to break into a warehouse of a well-known fashion corporation to rescue child laborers (accepted the job to gain access to the higher-ups)
>>> — <<<
Red Hood: “That’s me, dude.” *gestures at a billboard before lighting his cigarette*
Arsenal: “Where?”
Red Hood: *takes a drag* “There.”
Arsenal: “That’s a calloused hand and a Bear Grylls watch.”
Red Hood: “Yup.”
>>> — <<<
Jason: *catwalking*
Designer: *takes a bow onstage after their entire collection is presented*
Jason: *pounces at the model in front of him*
Audience: *slow-clapping awkwardly*
Later…
Batman [on the comm link]: “It really couldn’t wait, Jason?”
Jason [hiding backstage]: *frantically searching for wet wipes in his weapons bag to remove his makeup* “He was the mark, Bruce!”
Batman: *gritting his teeth* “I know. But did it have to be in front of everyone at Gotham Fashion Week?”
~ * ~ * ~ * ~
TIM:
Used to traveling and working long hours? ✔
and ✔.
He doesn’t model for anything you’d know (unless you’re a superhero, that is).
>>> — <<<
Edna Mode [visiting from the Disney universe]: “Walk for me, Timothy. I want to see how it fits on you."
Red Robin: *struts, then abruptly stops* "Ms. Mode, I know you’re not a big fan of capes, so I was thinking maybe we could add wings instead? I’ve tried them, and they’re actually pretty awesome. They’re also weaponize-able.” *fumbles for his sketches in his utility belt* “I could show you some designs I’ve been working on –”
Edna: *widens her eyes at him* “No wings!”
>>> — <<<
Tim: “And this –” *dabs a brush on some blush, then onto Conner’s face* is supposed to make your face melt.“
Conner: *examining his pinkish cheek through the tiny mirror* "Uhhh… Was this specially formulated for Kryptonian skin?”
Tim: *disappointed that nothing was happening to his best friend’s face* “Oh, dang, that’s right! I figured you were just healing really fast.”
~ * ~ * ~ * ~
DAMIAN:
Mention “OshKosh B’gosh” to him one more time, he dares you. (And learn the hard way, as Jason did, why you’d better not.)
Let’s just say that you don’t hire him; he hires you.
>>> — <<<
Damian: “I would like to model for you.”
Receptionist: “Sir… This is the Gotham Animal Welfare Society.”
Damian: “And I am Damian Wayne. Did I stutter?”
>>> — <<<
Damian: “Perhaps it is time I tell Father to set up a meeting with you and his ‘friends’ in the fashion industry.”
Alfred: “Master Damian, while I am truly flattered, I hardly consider myself a designer.”
Damian: *admiring his reflection in the mirror as he gently sways the green-and-red, hand-sewn thobe with gold accents that he’s wearing*
Alfred: “Besides, why on earth would the world want to see some bloody old butler’s –"
Damian: "Shush, Pennyworth.” *looks down at his feet, his eyes glistening* “You put them all to shame.”
Alfred: *pulls him in for a hug*
~ * ~ * ~ * ~
Oh, @fleetof-fandoms, how I wish I could tag you properly. Thank you for another cool suggestion!
Civilian: *looking at the masked vigilante in awe after he rescues her from a mugger* If you’re not a criminal, then what are you?
Red Hood: *rubs his neck sheepishly* About that…
Before going their separate ways after dinner at the Manor…
Red Hood: *strapping a box to his motorcycle*
Red Robin [to Alfred]: Why does Jason get a care package and not me?
Red Hood: *referring to Tim’s state-of-the-art safe house from Wayne Enterprises* You live in a care package.
Preparing for a date…
Dick: *frantically looking through Jason’s closet for dress shoes with hidden heels*
Jason [about Kori]: You realize she’s not that big, right? It’s mostly just hair.
When you eavesdrop on a conversation between your super dad and one of his super friends (and instantly regret it)…
Dick, Jason, Tim, and Damian: *hiding behind the dinosaur in the Batcave*
Bruce [on the phone with Clark]: *in a gruff voice* Hal thinks he can “Mean Girls” me?! Hn! How lame is that? Let me tell you something, I might be a pretty face, but I fight to win. Just like “Legally Blonde”!
Dick: *covers his mouth as he starts to giggle, then looks at Jason*
Jason: *sticks his tongue out in disgust, then looks as Tim*
Tim: *slowly shakes his head and mouths “Wrong, just wrong”*
Damian: *crosses his arms and lets out a small -Tt-*
When Red Hood and Red Robin get into an intense argument during patrol and the latter walks out in frustration…
*Cue heavy rainfall*
Red Hood: *scoffs* Don’t hate me for your son leaving.
Peralta men: doing the exact opposite of what they say
suggested by anonymous
IMAGINE:
Nightwing [to Alfred]: *after finding out that Bruce teamed up with Deathstroke for a case behind his back* “I’m gonna go down to the Batcave, and I’m gonna express my concerns to him in a calm, rational manner.”
5 minutes later…
Nightwing [to Batman]: *dramatically flailing his arms* “What are you doing, Bruce?! He’s evil!”
>>> — <<<
Dick [to Bruce]: *after telling him that Jason’s coming over to the manor* Look, I know you don’t like him right now, but can you at least try to be nice to him for me?
Bruce: *grunts*
5 minutes later…
Red Hood: *getting off his motorcycle on the Manor driveway*
Bruce: *stomping towards him and pointing at him* I’m glad you’re no longer dead, you lousy son of mine!
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 