While Thomas Wayne, the Flashpoint Batman, is visiting his son Bruce, the current Batman…
Jason: Grandpa, I’m not going to hit you!
Jason:
Jason: *sighs* No grandkid should ever have to say that.
Tag: big brother of the year
Imagine: Red Hood, when asked to patrol with the rest of the Batfamily. (*whispers* He secretly loves it.)
Jason being Extra be like…
Roy: Jaybird, I got a present for you. *carries a basket full of lotion bottles*
Jason: I don’t like lotion. I like my hands to be cracked and calloused like a railway worker.
Roy: I know. I filled the bottles with fake blood, vinegar, and mud.
Jason: *smiles* Really? Thanks!
At a bar…
Bartender: Where’d you get that jacket?
Jason: *sips beer* I was buried in it.
Bartender:
Bartender: *awkwardly moves away*
Idk some Gothamites are wack, they’d probably be into it
Clark Kent, mild-mannered reporter of the Daily Planet, following up on a lead at said bar: Jason? What’re you doing all the way here? Does your fath- Bruce know you’re here?
Imagine:
There’s Jason…
And then there’s Dick…
And, well, there’s Tim…
Or, alternatively: Tim, Dick, and Jason, respectively.
Red Hood, after being extracted by Green Lantern from a remote island as per Batman’s orders…
Jason: Well?! Being a vigilante makes you crazy! I mean what kind of job is that, where you get murdered and have to relive it over and over?! Hello, stress! Don’t even get me started on Bruce, I mean he –
Guy: He can be a steel-clad douchebag, I know. Why do you think I left the League?
Jason: Wh-? You were in the Justice League?!
Guy: Briefly, way back. Didn’t work out, because, ya know, your father…
Jason: Was impossible to please, right?
Guy: If you only knew…
Jason: What?
Guy: … how much your dad loves you! You would at least have the heart to go tell him you’re quitting in person.
Jason: Eesh. Rather get shot with a flare…
Negotiating their release from Nanda Parbat…
Red Hood: We gotta get that phone, or something, I don’t know! But I don’t want Bruce talking to Ra’s!
Arsenal: Why not? He’s been coming to your rescue since you were in green spandex briefs!
Batman [on the Comm Link]: Jason, I know I may not say this very often –
Red Hood: Or ever.
Batman: Well, congratulations, you ruined it. But I’m still very proud of you.
Red Hood: Awww!
Batman: Hrrrn.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 