Damian: *walks away after insulting Jason*
Jason: He’s a mean kid.
Tim: So, what? You’re mean, too.
Jason: Yes, but not to you!
Tim: Yesterday you told me my head was too big for my neck.
Jason: That was… constructive criticism.
Tim: Well, what am I supposed to do about it, Jay?!
Jason: As a brother, my job is only to point things out.
Tag: big brother of the year
Red Hood [to thug]: I bark.
Red Hood: That kid there, see him? *points to Robin*
Red Hood: He bites.
Imagine: The Robins (blue) to Batman. Or, Batman (blue) to Alfred.
When your youngest brother tells you to stay put by the Batmobile as he sneaks into one of the Joker’s lairs…
Red Hood: What am I supposed to do out here?
Robin: Why don’t you go meditate on the poor life decisions you’ve made?
Red Hood: Don’t give me the “hurt feelings” thing, Bruce. Because A, I don’t buy it, and B, I don’t care.
After interviewing a witness in Gotham City…
Red Robin [on the Comm Link, to Nightwing]: Yeah, she was saying that this guy with a red helmet was really nice and polite, and that he was a gentleman.
Red Robin: *nods*
Red Robin: I wanted to make sure we were talking about the same Jason Todd.
Chaperoning Lian with your best friend at Junior Prom be like…
Roy: *grinning* You know, I taught her those moves.
Jason: Don’t teach her any more moves. Those are enough moves right there. She doesn’t need any more of your moves.
How Jason “broke up” with Roy in the New 52…
Jason: I’ve been hanging out with you too long.
Roy: Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
Jason: Both.
Red Robin: @paranoidmedic, ha! Like that one time when Bruce said –
Red Hood: Tim, don’t you DARE –
Red Robin: – “I – ”
Red Hood: *tackles Tim to the ground*
Red Robin: *struggling to speak while being smothered by Jason’s letter jacket* Bru- Bruce s-s-said – Jason, get orfff –
Red Hood: You shut your pie hole!
Robin: Father told him he loved him.
Nightwing: In the middle of an argument. It was touching, really.
Robin: Todd stopped moving.
Red Robin: *sputtering* O-or b-breath-breathing, as if died aga– Ow, Jay! –
Nightwing: I think he’s afraid that Bruce’s going to surprise him with affection again.
Robin: -Tt- It is kind of hard to tell with Father’s tone.
Red Hood: *screams in agony*
Batman:
Martian Manhunter:
Batman:
Martian Manhunter: *frowning*
Batman:
Martian Manhunter: *glares at Bruce, flips his cape, and storms out, looking offended*
Batman: J’onn, hold on, what –
Batman: Can’t a man think in private anymore?
Batman: Barry, could you –
The Flash: It wasn’t me, I swear! *runs away*
Batman: About Gotham Bay, Arthur –
Aquaman: I am not in the mood, Bruce. *swims away*
Batman:
Batman: Hrrn.
Superman: *standing next to Bruce* 😏
Batman: -Tt-
Batman: Go ahead, Clark. Fly away.
Superman: Noooope.
Batman: Ugh. *walks away*
Superman: Right, @dangerous-doodle ?
Superman: *throws his hands up in exasperation* Thank you, @hillshollow !
Batman: Hn.
Superman: Just this morning, at breakfast, for crying out loud! *imitating Bruce’s voice* “Clark, pass the ketchup.” Tone. “Jordan, you seem to enjoy eating garbage.” Tone. “Diana –” Well, you did dial it down for that one.
Batman: *puffing out his chest and putting his hands on his hips* And this is necessary at all times?
Superman:
Superman: *eyes glowing red* ARGH! *walks out of the hall*
Superman: There’s just no winning with you, Bruce!
Batman:
Batman: *smirks*
I imagine ‘that tone’ is Bruce’s usual voice…🤔
When your bestfriend accuses you of unnecessarily intimidating someone…
Superman: You say I have a face.
Batman: *scoffs*
Superman: You have a tone, and it says, “I’m gonna hit somebody.”
Dick and Barbara: *watching Damian jump from one gigantic memento to another in the Batcave*
Barbara: He is kind of adorable.
Dick: I know! Isn’t he? Remember when Jason was like this?
Jason: What the heck do you people say when I’m not here?
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 