When your legally dead brother’s “low-key” bitter that he wasn’t included in the latest Wayne Family painting…
Tim: Did you just paste your picture over our family portrait?
Jason: Yeah, I think it looks better.
Tim: You pasted it over my face.
Jason: Yeah, I think it looks better.
Tag: big brother of the year
Waiting for your eldest brother at his Blüdhaven aparment be like…
Damian: *pinches nose* Disgusting. What’s that smell?
Jason: It’s either bad meat or good cheese.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Find yourself a Nightwing who can do both.
At the Wayne Manor attic…
Dick: *dramatically walks out from behind a dusty, old cabinet wearing his 80’s Nightwing suit*
Jason: *clears his throat loudly*
Tim: *standing absolutely still but with shoulders shaking*
Damian: *jaw drop*
Duke: *eyes wide, covering his mouth*
Dick: You guys think I’m some sort of a joke!
Jason, Tim, Damian, and Duke: *break into a fit of laughter*
Jason: *wiping tears off his eyes* This isn’t disproving that theory.
Red Hood [to the Batfamily]: I’m finally having a good time again. I thought you guys would appreciate that.
Nightwing: We would if you were using your skills for just fighting crime instead of doing crime.
Red Hood: *walks into the Batcave and heads directly to the Medical Bay*
Tim and Damian: *yelling insults at each other*
Red Hood: *reaches out for the bandages and grimaces in pain as he straightens his bleeding leg*
Tim and Damian: *take their argument into the Medical Bay and start grabbing surgical tools to throw at each other*
Red Hood: *pulls them apart by the scruff of their necks*
Red Hood: I’ve been shot at, thrown out of an airplane and generally mistreated by a lot of bad guys. This bickering is pretty much more that I can take. I’m going outside to get some fresh air. When I get back, you two better be calmed down or we’re breaking out the ball gags.
Jason Tim’s about half a wreck, huh?
Dick: Yeah, so why do you pick on him?
Jason: I… Oh, was that not rhetorical?
Red Robin: *examining an image on the Batcomputer screen* I think it might be a quantum-chromo-dynamic-confinement anomaly.
Red Hood: Now you’re just stringing words together.
Getting stranded up in the Himalayan Mountains while on a mission be like…
Red Robin: Look, I’m sure we’re not the only ones who need to be rescued. Plus, things could be a lot worse.
Red Hood: Yeah, how’s that?
Red Robin: We could be stuck here with Damian.
Jason: You’re going to be okay.
Tim: Am I?
Jason: *shrugs* Yeah, ‘cause you’re, like, ten times more resilient than me, and I’m okay.
When you open your safe house door and find your rain-drenched little brother standing there…
Damian: Todd, I believe you know why I’m here.
Jason: *yawns* I always figured it was to study us, discover our weaknesses, and report back to your alien overlords.
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