incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Mission up in the Himalayan Mountains…

Red Robin: I’m feeling perfectly warm.

Red Hood: That’s because you’re like a little Komodo dragon. An ice queen.

Red Robin: Or because I remembered to wear my thermal underwear.

Red Hood: I’ll give you $50 for it right now.

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

When Jason finds a way into the Fifth Dimension,uncertain of what – or who – exactly he’s facing, knowing only that Tim’s in there somewhere and that he’s not leaving without his younger brother… 

Red Hood [to an astral projection of Mister Mxyzptlk]: I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you’re looking for ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money…

Red Hood: But what I do have is a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for creatures like you. 

Red Hood: If you let my brother go now, that will be the end of it. I will not look for you. I will not pursue you. 

Red Hood: But if you don’t, I will look for you.

Red Hood: I will find you.

Red Hood: And I will kill you.

~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~

Astral projection of Batman from out of nowhere: Jason, we do not kill. 

Damian: *arranging limited-edition figurines of Batman, Nightwing, Robin and Superboy on his shelf*

Jason: Ah. Your doll collection.

Damian: These are not dolls, Todd. These are commodities. Same as gold or oil.

Dick: Hey, Little Wing.

Jason: Screw you.

Damian: Excuse me, that is no way to address a superior.

Jason: Oh, yeah? Screw you, too.

Tim: *walking into the room and bumping into Jason, who’s fumingly on his way out*

Tim: Whoa. What was that all about?

Alfred: *gives them a pointed look*

Alfred: You all forgot his death anniversary. It was yesterday.

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Interventions at the Manor…

Alfred: *wearing a mask and carrying a vacuum cleaner*

Dick: *putting on gloves*

Jason: *filling a black garbage bag with piles of… What are these, Timbo?*

Damian: *pinching his nose and looking around in pure disgust*

Tim: I want to get rid of my stuff, but all my stuff is really good and I just can’t get rid of it.

Dick: It’s not and you have to.

Jason: Everything you own is trash.

Damian: You’re basically a hoarder, Drake.

Tim: *chugs a mug of coffee and stains his three-day-old shirt further*

Tim: Not true. Everything has meaning. Everything is connected to something else.

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Mornings at the Manor…

Jason: *following Tim around the kitchen* Lotus Bear Relax! I can smell it on you right now!

Tim: *slapping his hand away* Stop smelling my hair, dude!

Jason: Do you know how much that stuff cost?

Tim: I didn’t use your conditioner, Jay!

Jason: Then why does your hair look so baby soft?!

Alfred: *sighs*

Alfred: *adds “conditioner” to grocery list*

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Mornings at the Manor…

Jason: *following Tim around the kitchen* Lotus Bear Relax! I can smell it on you right now!

Tim: *slapping his hand away* Stop smelling my hair, dude!

Jason: Do you know how much that stuff cost?

Tim: I didn’t use your conditioner, Jay!

Jason: Then why does your hair look so baby soft?!

Alfred: *sighs*

Alfred: *adds “conditioner” to grocery list*