When your brothers are all set to go Trick-or-Treating but you’re still on the Batcomputer working on a case…
Dick (in a merman costume): Timmy… ?
Jason (in a Bizarro costume): He’s wearing a costume. He’s going as lame.
Tag: big brother of the year
Tim: I want to tell you my secret now.
Conner: Okay…
Tim: I see dead people.
Conner: …
Conner: In your dreams? While you’re awake? Dead people, like, in graves, in coffins?
Tim: Walking around like regular people.
~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~
Okay, first of all, those’re just Jason and Damian walking around the Manor. Secondly, GET SOME SLEEP, Timothy.
Infiltrating a top secret government facility…
Red Hood: Why are you sitting in the stairwell?
Robin: Grayson told me to stay.
Red Hood: Oh.
Red Hood: *pats his head* Well, good boy.
In which you’d better be thankful your teeny brother didn’t bite your arm off, Jay.
Undercover as S.T.A.R Labs employees…
Dick: *polishing his faux glasses* Jay, you look so smart in that coat.
Jason: Not that smart. I just found out that you’re supposed to wear clothes under this thing.
Jason: *tosses a small package* First time you’ve ever held a grenade?
Duke: *catches it with trembling hands* Yes. It was never really a goal of mine.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
This is not how you “bond” with a new family member, Jay.
Jason: *tosses a small package* First time you’ve ever held a grenade?
Duke: *catches it with trembling hands* Yes. It was never really a goal of mine.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
This is not how you “bond” with a new family member, Jay.
When your eldest brother asks you to look after his Blüdhaven apartment while he’s away on a mission…
Red Robin: Oh, come on, Dick’s a grown man. He can take care of himself.
Red Hood: *opens the refrigerator to reveal a bottle of curdy milk, a half-eaten sandwich, and a bowl of soggy Cheerios*
Red Hood: *looking unimpressed* You really believe that?
When your legally dead brother’s “low-key” bitter that he wasn’t included in the latest Wayne Family painting…
Tim: Did you just paste your picture over our family portrait?
Jason: Yeah, I think it looks better.
Tim: You pasted it over my face.
Jason: Yeah, I think it looks better.
When Batman (inexplicably) asks Hellblazer to watch over his sons while he’s away on a mission…
Nightwing: *comes in through the front door of the Manor*
Hellblazer: Ah, the Golden Boy has returned. Release the doves!
Nightwing: Hi, Mr. Constantine.
Red Hood: *breaks a window in the foyer and climbs in*
Hellblazer: And you must be the second Robin. I have been thoroughly briefed on you and if you do one thing wrong, I’m going to go medieval on your arse.
When Batman (inexplicably) asks Hellblazer to watch over his sons while he’s away on a mission…
Nightwing: *comes in through the front door of the Manor*
Hellblazer: Ah, the Golden Boy has returned. Release the doves!
Nightwing: Hi, Mr. Constantine.
Red Hood: *breaks a window in the foyer and climbs in*
Hellblazer: And you must be the second Robin. I have been thoroughly briefed on you and if you do one thing wrong, I’m going to go medieval on your arse.