incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

tmntchickadee:

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Superman: *clears his throat*

Batman:

Superman: *gets out of the Batmobile*

Batman:

Superman: *awkwardly pats the roof* Well. That was a long, silent car ride. Now I know how Dick feels.

You know any of his children would have music blaring and talking whether he contributes or not

Nightwing: *bops his head and taps his fingers on the dashboard to the beat of NSYNC’s “It’s Gonna Be Me”*

Nightwing: *takes an earphone out of his ear* What was that?

Batman:

Nightwing:

Batman:

Nightwing:

Batman: *clears his throat*

Nightwing: Oh, I thought I saw your mouth move.

Nightwing: *jams the earphone back in* A man can dream.

Nightwing: *checks the digital map and sighs* Five miles to gooo. Why do supervillain lairs have to be so far?

Batman:

Batman: Sync with bluetooth, code “A37”.

NSYNC: *starts blaring on the Batmobile speakers*

Nightwing: *takes off both earphones and grins at Bruce*

Batman: *grins*

Red Hood: *gets in and slams the Batmobile door excitedly* Thanks for picking me up, Big Bro *takes off his helmet and shakes his hair dry* Some kid from Crime Alley stole one of my tires, pretty impressive, actually – *rummaging through his jacket pockets for a USB drive* Plus there’s this cool new album that Roy wants us to check out, so turn that 90’s boyband crap off for just a sec – Hey, want me to transfer to the – the –

Red Hood: *finally notices Batman on the passenger seat and sullenly says* Yo.

Batman: *grunts*

Red Hood: *rolls his eyes*

Nightwing: *sees his brother’s reflection on the rearview mirror and grins* If I’d told you, would you have gotten in?

Red Hood: *muttering* Tss. Could’ve walked home. I have safehouses everywhere.

Nightwing: *cups an ear* What was that?

Red Hood: *crosses his arms* Nothing! Just shut up and drive.

Nightwing: *smirks*

Red Hood:

Batman:

Red Hood: Look, I’m sorry, I didn’t know you’d be –

Batman:

Red Hood: *looks out the window* Never mind.

Batman:

Nightwing:

Red Hood: *tapping his foot awkwardly* Sooo… You let Golden Boy drive this thing. Neat.

Batman:

Nightwing: *trying to stifle a giggle*

Red Hood: Dick, you can just drop me off right here –

Batman: No.

Red Hood: *frowns*

Batman: *extends a palm towards Jason* The drive.

Red Hood:

Red Hood: *reluctantly drops it on Bruce’s palm*

Batman: *plugs it into the console*

Nightwing: *to the Comm Link, smiling from ear to ear* Alfred? Yeah. Extra plate on the dinner table, please.

Thirteen songs from “Harper’s Mix” later…

Nightwing: So lemme get this straight: You were just on my case for listening to 90′s music, and now you’re going gaga over –

Red Hood: *skips to the next track* Ssh, Goldie. This one?

Batman: *listens to the intro for 1.5 seconds*

Batman: “Unchained Melody”. 1955. Todd Duncan –

Red Hood: Wow.

Nightwing: Don’t you mean the Righteous Brothers?

Batman: – sang the vocals for the film “Unchained”.

Red Hood: You are officially old.

Batman: *grinning wistfully* My mother used to hum it to me.

Nightwing:

Red Hood:

Batman: *still grinning wistfully*

Red Hood: *clears his throat* That’s, um, swell. Hey, if you get this next one, I’ll concede and declare you King of –

Radio: *skipping tracks randomly*

Red Hood: What the –

Radio: *rewinds and fast-forwards by itself, then plays “Basket Case” by Green Day*

Red Hood: That wasn’t even on there!

Radio: *in a chipmunk voice* Jason Peter Todd, also known as the Red Hood, we summon you –

Red Hood: *points a gun at the console* AaaAArRggh –

Nightwing: *swerving the Batmobile slightly* Calm down, Little Wing!

Batman: Timothy, enough.

Radio: *erupts into belly laughter*

Radio: *wheezing* Y-you sh-should’ve seen your face, Jay. *sighs contentedly* What time are you guys getting here? I’m bored and hungry.

Red Hood: And dead meat. *crushes the tiny camera suctioned to the window*

Radio: Yeah, yeah. Drive faster, Dick –

Alfred [in the background]: Absolutely not!

Radio: You heard the man. Red Robin out! *static*

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Happy to, @mysticalmeowler.​ 

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

tmntchickadee:

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Superman: *clears his throat*

Batman:

Superman: *gets out of the Batmobile*

Batman:

Superman: *awkwardly pats the roof* Well. That was a long, silent car ride. Now I know how Dick feels.

You know any of his children would have music blaring and talking whether he contributes or not

Nightwing: *bops his head and taps his fingers on the dashboard to the beat of NSYNC’s “It’s Gonna Be Me”*

Nightwing: *takes an earphone out of his ear* What was that?

Batman:

Nightwing:

Batman:

Nightwing:

Batman: *clears his throat*

Nightwing: Oh, I thought I saw your mouth move.

Nightwing: *jams the earphone back in* A man can dream.

Nightwing: *checks the digital map and sighs* Five miles to gooo. Why do supervillain lairs have to be so far?

Batman:

Batman: Sync with bluetooth, code “A37”.

NSYNC: *starts blaring on the Batmobile speakers*

Nightwing: *takes off both earphones and grins at Bruce*

Batman: *grins*

Red Hood: *gets in and slams the Batmobile door excitedly* Thanks for picking me up, Big Bro *takes off his helmet and shakes his hair dry* Some kid from Crime Alley stole one of my tires, pretty impressive, actually – *rummaging through his jacket pockets for a USB drive* Plus there’s this cool new album that Roy wants us to check out, so turn that 90’s boyband crap off for just a sec – Hey, want me to transfer to the – the –

Red Hood: *finally notices Batman on the passenger seat and sullenly says* Yo.

Batman: *grunts*

Red Hood: *rolls his eyes*

Nightwing: *sees his brother’s reflection on the rearview mirror and grins* If I’d told you, would you have gotten in?

Red Hood: *muttering* Tss. Could’ve walked home. I have safehouses everywhere.

Nightwing: *cups an ear* What was that?

Red Hood: *crosses his arms* Nothing! Just shut up and drive.

Nightwing: *smirks*

Red Hood:

Batman:

Red Hood: Look, I’m sorry, I didn’t know you’d be –

Batman:

Red Hood: *looks out the window* Never mind.

Batman:

Nightwing:

Red Hood: *tapping his foot awkwardly* Sooo… You let Golden Boy drive this thing. Neat.

Batman:

Nightwing: *trying to stifle a giggle*

Red Hood: Dick, you can just drop me off right here –

Batman: No.

Red Hood: *frowns*

Batman: *extends a palm towards Jason* The drive.

Red Hood:

Red Hood: *reluctantly drops it on Bruce’s palm*

Batman: *plugs it into the console*

Nightwing: *to the Comm Link, smiling from ear to ear* Alfred? Yeah. Extra plate on the dinner table, please.

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

When your adoptive father has trust issues with your crimefighting methods…

Red Hood: *running through a dark alley*

Red Hood: *stops abruptly and catches his breath*

Red Hood: *rolls his eyes at his little brother, who’s in the Batjet hovering above him* I don’t need to be monitored all day long, brat. I’m not a toddler. This is stupid.

Robin [on the Comm Link]: I know you’re not, Todd, because toddlers would know that “stupid” is a no-no word.

When your adoptive father has trust issues with your crimefighting methods…

Red Hood: *running through a dark alley*

Red Hood: *stops abruptly and catches his breath*

Red Hood: *rolls his eyes at his little brother, who’s in the Batjet hovering above him* I don’t need to be monitored all day long, brat. I’m not a toddler. This is stupid.

Robin [on the Comm Link]: I know you’re not, Todd, because toddlers would know that “stupid” is a no-no word.

Red Hood: *peeks from behind a crate at a group of burly men in state-of-the-art armor guarding the warehouse entrance*

Red Hood: *whispering* How are we going to get past them without a gun fight?

Red Robin: *studying a digital blueprint of the warehouse* I’ll tell you how John McClane would do it: the vents.

Red Hood: *stuffs his revolvers back into their holsters and nods enthusiastically* Blast the A/C, they get chilly, they leave to find sweaters. 

Red Robin:

Red Robin: No. We’re going to climb through them. 

Red Hood: Even better! Classic use of vents.

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Mornings at the Manor…

Jason: *scurrying around the kitchen, opening and closing cupboards, looking under kitchen counters and chairs* 

Tim: *typing on his laptop, drinking pure liquid caffeine*

Jason: I have to tell you something. When we fell on really hard times, Roy and I stayed at a rat-infested motel for a month, and I developed a deep-seated fear of rats.

Tim: *not looking away from laptop* I am so sorry to hear about that. I understand your fears and I validate them.

Jason: I’m not looking for your understanding, Tim! Just grab the freakin’ rat!