When your best friend can read through an entire textbook in two seconds flat…
Hal: *drops a bunch of books on Barry’s desk* I need you to upload these to your brain.
Barry: *examining a specimen under a microscope* One, I’m busy. And, two, I’m not a computer.
Hal: Actually, you kind of are. I need you to learn all of this stuff so you can teach me.
Barry: Why?
Hal: So I can impress a lady.
Barry: Such predictable motives. This is extortion.
Tag: barry allen
Green Lantern [about Batman]: Can you believe that guy?!
The Flash: Yeah, he’s like a really handsome Darth Vader.
Barry: Mm-hmmm. *wiping his mouth* That burger was so good, I feel like I just cheated on you.
Iris: Yeah, I heard the moaning.
Superman: *depowered in a Kryptonite-lined cage*
Wonder Woman: *tied up by her own lasso*
The Flash: *weakened by a low blood sugar level*
Green Lantern: *closing and opening a ring-less hand*
Batman: *walks into the room*
Robin: *comes out from under his cape*
Green Lantern: You got a kid with you? Greaaaat. And you’re the ones saving us?
Gossiping about Batman…
Hal [to Barry]: One butler? Very frugal for a bazillionare.
Hal: *pats Barry on the shoulder* I’ll buy the next round. I just have to go home and get my wallet.
Barry: *hands cash to the bartender* You’ve been saying the same thing for ten years.
Hal: I got you a present for your trip to Mexico with Iris. It’s my old Spanish to English dictionary. I don’t need it anymore. I’ve mastered the language
Barry: Gracias, Señor.
Hal: You’re welcomo.
Getting caught in an argument between Barman and Superman at the Watchtower…
Green Lantern: So, who’d you side with?
The Flash: Neither. I just pretended we were telepathically paged by J’onn. And then when they said they didn’t hear anything, I called them both liars and zoomed away.
Green Lantern: Smooth.
Impulse [about Iris]: You see the way Grandpa looks at her? It’s like how Wally looks at a cheeseburger.
Hal: What was I like in the other timeline?
Barry: You were a perfect gentleman.
Hal: Well, that’s boring.
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