Tag: appreciation post

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Superman: *throws his hands up in exasperation* Thank you, @hillshollow !

Batman: Hn.

Superman: Just this morning, at breakfast, for crying out loud! *imitating Bruce’s voice* “Clark, pass the ketchup.” Tone. “Jordan, you seem to enjoy eating garbage.” Tone. “Diana –” Well, you did dial it down for that one.

Batman: *puffing out his chest and putting his hands on his hips* And this is necessary at all times?

Superman:

Superman: *eyes glowing red* ARGH! *walks out of the hall*

Superman: There’s just no winning with you, Bruce!

Batman:

Batman: *smirks*

hillshollow:

I imagine ‘that tone’ is Bruce’s usual voice…🤔

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

When your bestfriend accuses you of unnecessarily intimidating someone…

Superman: You say I have a face.

Batman: *scoffs*

Superman: You have a tone, and it says, “I’m gonna hit somebody.”

Batman: Barry, could you –

The Flash: It wasn’t me, I swear! *runs away*

Batman: About Gotham Bay, Arthur –

Aquaman: I am not in the mood, Bruce. *swims away*

Batman:

Batman: Hrrn.

Superman: *standing next to Bruce* 😏

Batman: -Tt-

Batman: Go ahead, Clark. Fly away.

Superman: Noooope.

Batman: Ugh. *walks away*

Superman: Right, @dangerous-doodle ?

Red Hood: *dramatically takes out two machine guns from underneath his leather jacket*

Red Hood: *clears his throat, then switches to Tony Montana’s accent* Say hello to my little friends!

The Signal: Uh, dude, I don’t think they meant we should cause the riot –

Red Robin: *yelling a la-Tarzan while grapple-hooking from wall to wall*

Goliath: *taking ground-shaking steps around the Batcave with Damian on his back*

Robin: *laughing tyranically*

Nightwing: *carrying a crate of glowsticks and party poppers* Hey, y’all started without –

Nightwing:

Nightwing: It’s Alfred. RUN!

Alfred: *walking into a seemingly empty Batcave and speaking to seemingly no one* Dinner is served. If you wish to partake of it, I suggest you all make better life decisions from this moment on.

Alfred: And you – *looking squarely at @kittyofalltrades* – may join us.

Alfred: *walks out*

The Batboys: *scurries out of their hiding places and runs after him*

The Signal: *looks back at @kittyofalltrades* So, uh, you coming?

~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~

Thank you for dropping by, @kittyofalltrades. 😎

~ a-wayne-at-heart/incorrect-batfamily-quotes

hillshollow:

I imagine ‘that tone’ is Bruce’s usual voice…🤔

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

When your bestfriend accuses you of unnecessarily intimidating someone…

Superman: You say I have a face.

Batman: *scoffs*

Superman: You have a tone, and it says, “I’m gonna hit somebody.”

Superman: *throws his hands up in exasperation* Thank you, @hillshollow !

Batman: Hn.

Superman: Just this morning, at breakfast, for crying out loud! *imitating Bruce’s voice* “Clark, pass the ketchup.” Tone. “Jordan, you seem to enjoy eating garbage.” Tone. “Diana –” Well, you did dial it down for that one.

Batman: *puffing out his chest and putting his hands on his hips* And this is necessary at all times?

Superman:

Superman: *eyes glowing red* ARGH! *walks out of the hall*

Superman: There’s just no winning with you, Bruce!

Batman:

Batman: *smirks*

Red Robin: *crawling on the floor* Uuurrgghhhhrr…

Red Robin: *grabs hold of a metal bar* Hhhrrrnnnnhhh…

Red Robin: *struggles to hoist himself onto a chair* …aaAHhhhhhraaahh –

Robin: Pathetic.

Robin: *shuts down the Batcomputer*

Red Robin: NOOOOOOOO! *breaks down in tears*

Red Hood: *fireman-carries a sobbing Tim* It’s really for your own good, Timbo –

Nightwing: *walks into the Batcave* Everything alright?

Robin: Drake refuses to sleep!

The Signal: Something about wanting, no, needing to post… whatever, man, who knows… because something, something happiness…?

Nightwing:

Nightwing: *turns on the Batcomputer*

Nightwing: Who’s @dangerous-doodle ?

~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~

Someone who made me real happy back, Dick.

Thank you so much, @dangerous-doodle . 😎

~ a-wayne-at-heart/incorrect-batfamily-quotes

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

An Incorrect Interview with the Batfamily…

Batman: I have it on good authority that you’ve been posting these, quote-unquote, incorrect quotes about our family on this so-called… *narrows his eyes* Tumblr.

Me: *blinks*

Me: *shuddering slightly* Well, see, Mr. Batman, um,Sir Wayne, uh, Batwayne –

Nightwing: *gets up from his chair and hugs me tightly*

Me: Oh! Oh, okay. Wow. Thanks? So, um, do you have a question or… ?

Nightwing: *shakes his head and grins at me* I just wanted to lighten the mood. You know how our father tends to blur the line between an interview and an interrog–

Red Hood: *clears his throat loudly*

Red Hood: Why, um… Why the heck do you call me *reading something scribbled on his palm* “Big Brother of the Year”?

Me: Well, see, Jay, even though you see yourself as the “black sheep” of the family, I do believe that there’s some goodness in your heart and that you do care very much about them. I think Croc said it best: you’re a good kid trying to be bad, and – Are you okay?

Red Hood’s Helmet: – bZzt bzZt –

Me: Your helmet’s… There’s smoke coming out of your –

Red Hood: *gets up from his seat and speed-walks out of the room*

Me: Did I say something wrong?

Red Robin: No. His tears must’ve fried the circuits in his helmet. Anyway, is this where you live? *shows me a map on his tablet with coordinates to my residence*

Me: *wide-eyed* How’d you – ?

Red Robin: Don’t worry about it. Now, my real question is, is there a lot of coffee where you’re from?

Me: Well –

Red Robin: Like really strong cofee? *zooming in and out of the map* For some reason, I can’t get intel –

Robin: *shoves Tim out of the way*

Robin: Pretender! Where do you get the nerve –

Me: – to make you look adorable? Look, Dami, I can’t help it –

Black Bat: *grapple-hooks into the room and grabs me*

Spoiler: Alright, creeps, that’s enough blogger harrassment for today!

Batgirl: *whispering into my ear* I’m so sorry you had to go through this.

Alfred: *walks into the room*

Room: *falls silent*

Alfred: No dessert for all of you.

Everyone (including Bruce): *whines*

Alfred: As for you *looks at me*…

Me: *blinks*

Alfred: … we would appreciate it if you joined us for dinner. *walks out of the room with Batcow and Titus in tow*

The Signal: *turns off the camera and runs after Alfred* But I was just filming everything, I swear!

Catwoman: *comes in through the kitchen window* Meow. Did I miss the interview?

~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~ · ~

I guess this is just my way of saying THANK YOU for your continued patronage.

Sincerely *with lots of cute, little hearts*,

a-wayne-at-heart/incorrect-batfamily-quotes

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Listening to Dick and Kory argue for about the hundredth time on their road trip…

Gar: *drinking the Capri Sun that Kory stuffed in his sweater pocket* Are you picking up on the chemistry that’s going on?

Rachel: *rummaging through the backpack that Dick packed for her* It’s like they’re married.

Dick: *scoffs* @spaceprincessem What, you actually think we’re like some married couple? So maybe Rach and Gar kind of need parents right now. And maybe we’re “co-parenting” or whatever. But does that automatically make us marr–

Kory: Dick, who’re you talking to?

Dick: No one, Hone– Kory! I meant, Kory.

dangerous-doodle:

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

batmanisagatewaydrug:

tonight’s obsession: circumstances that lead to the Batfamily giving up and calling an uber  

Nightwing: *speaking in a hushed tone* No, no, B, look, just –

Nightwing: *hissing* Will you stop that please? You’re breaking the freakin’ door! You want to buy this nice gentleman a brand new car, is that what you want?

Batman: *snorts, then let’s go of the door handle and glares at the window*

Nightwing: There. Was that so hard? Now, relax. As I was saying, once in a while, it’s nice to let someone else take the wheel, you know? To just let go of that consuming urge to control everything and everyone and –

Driver: *eyeing them through the rear view mirror* So, you two headed to the Gotham Comic Con?

Batman: Hrrrn.

Nightwing: Yes, yes, that’s exactly it.

Red Robin: *wakes up with a jolt* Huh, what, where am I? Who are you?!

Driver: Sir, I’m your driver and you’re in an Uber that you booked…?

Red Robin: Oh. *relaxes into his seat, staining it further with the blood dripping from his suit*

Driver: *eyeing him through the rear view mirror* Costume party, huh?

Red Robin: *thinking about how patrol went and chuckling* Clowns, shrinks, hyenas… You name it.

Driver: Sounds wild.

Red Robin: *yawning* Yuppp yup yup.

Driver: Also, I just want to make sure, because it says here on the map that I’m supposed to drop you at *zooms the location in* a garbage dumpsite…?

Red Robin: Yeah, don’t worry about. *shuts his eyes and goes back to sleep*

At Gotham Academy…

Damian: *glares at the driver through the rear view mirror*

Driver: *shifts uncomfortably in his seat*

Damian: You’re not Pennyworth.

Driver: Uh, excuse me, Sir?

Damian: *narrows his eyes and whispers in his ear* He told me he’d pick me up. So why. Aren’t you. Pennyworth.

Driver: I don’t, uh, I’m not – Sir, I just – *shaking, sweating, and about to hit the call button after dialling “911”*

Damian: That won’t be necessary.

Damian: *gets out of the car and dials a number*

~ • ~ • ~ • ~ •~

Alfred [on the phone]: *chopping vegetables* Master Damian, I understand you’re upset, but it’s time you learned other means of transpor– Oh, oh, dear. I apologize, my dear boy. No, you were not being abandoned, I just thought– Shh, shhh. No more crying. I’m on my way. [*click*]

Red Hood: *takes off his helmet, adjusts his domino mask, and lights up a cigarette*

Driver: Sir, that’s not –

Red Hood: *blows smoke out of a window and offers him a stick* Want one?

Driver: No, it’s, it’s fine. *gulps* Thank you.

Red Hood: You seen any penguins lately?

Driver: Penguins… Like, the ones at the zoo?

Red Hood: No. Suspicious ones.

Driver: I, um… don’t think so.

Red Hood: *puts his cigarette out and flicks it into a garbage bin they pass* Just drop me off at that bar right there.

Driver: Are you sure? Because it says on the map that we’re still half a mile away from The Daily Planet –

Red Hood: *reloading a gun and muttering to himself while looking intensely out the of the window* There you are, you piece of filth. Hiding out in Metropolis like the coward that you are –

Driver: *gulps as he eyes him through the rear view mirror*

Red Hood: *hands a hundred dollar bill to the driver, then pats him on the shoulder* Thanks, man.

Driver: *gets a jolt as he hears the door slam shut* You’re welcome, Sir… Rason Rodd.

RASON RODD

He does that every time, doesn’t he?

Hason Hodd

Mason Modd

Tason Jodd

Kason Kodd

Cason Codd

Lason Lodd

Chason Chodd

Hgnrnrnnnnnnnn

Jtason Jtodd: *lighting a cigarette* Who the heck’re those?

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Evenings in the Batcave…

Batman: *typing on the Batcomputer*

Red Robin: *tuning up the Redbird*

Batman: Fart.

Red Robin:

Red Robin: Uh…

Red Robin: Did you say “fart”?

Batman: Yes. That’s me being rather silly.

~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~

And, to this day, no one believes Tim.

Superman: *fighting Parademons on Apokolips*

Superman:

Superman: *chuckles* Fart.

~ • ~ • ~ •

I mean if Clark can canonically single out Bruce’s heartbeat while flying over earth, I think he can hear him say “Fart”.

@sleepytarotcat

dangerous-doodle:

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Wally: *scoffs* Don’t listen to Dick. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about. The guy eats cereal with a fork.

he wHAT

Nightwing, fresh from patrol with the Titans: *munching on said cereal* Look *swallows* I didn’t think I had to stop eating this stuff just because, uh… *looks around at all the unpacked boxes in his apartment* Look, I know the spoon’s in there somewhere. Been kinda busy. 🤷‍♂