Tim: *watches from a distance as Jason and Damian squabble over who gets to touch Alfred’s cookies first*
Tim: Dick, you ever notice how much of our job is like babysitting?
Dick Grayson: We won’t lose because we have this.
Dick Grayson: *points at his chest*
M’gann M’orzz: We have heart?
Dick Grayson: Heart? No. Me. I’m pointing at myself. I’m going to win this for us.
A member of the Batfamily in any team, a summary.
Detective Montoya: What are you doing, Red?! You just blew my cover!
Red Hood: Or did I save your life?
Montoya: Or did you compromise an investigation and piss off a police officer?!
Red Hood: I’m sensing from your tone it’s that one.
Nightwing: I need your help on a super top secret mission.
Beast Boy: Do I get to parachute out of a plane as a wild horse?
Nightwing: No, you do not, because nobody ever does, but you do get to wear an ear piece.
Beast Boy: Sold!
#titans (2018)
Superman: *clears his throat awkwardly* Because I value our relationship, Bruce, I need to be frank with you: We are in a fight.
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
We know where Jon gets it from.
On the way to Red Robin’s new safe house…
Steph: I can’t wait to see the inside of Tim’s safe house! I’m gonna learn everything there is to know about him.
Harper: I bet it’s really fancy. Like Wayne-Manor-fancy.
Jason: No. It’s probably just an empty, white cube with a USB port in it for him to plug his finger in when he’s on Sleep Mode.
When your super-powered colleagues beg you to teach them your “edgy” ways…
Green Lantern: How’s that field training with Barry going?
Batman: Let me put it this way, Jordan: he makes you look like a natural-born vigilante.
Tam: Tim, I fell for you after you fixed my phone and before I found out you could defuse bombs with computer viruses.
Taking your crush on a tour of the Manor be like…
Tam: *walking slowly around Tim’s bedroom and checking out posters of obscure rock bands on the walls*
Tam: *smirking* You know, you’re weird.
Tim: *trying to sound chill while (almost) soundlessly dumping his disguises into his cabinet, kicking weapons under his bed, and taking down case photos linked with thread and pinned to his headboard, all while Tam’s back is still to him* You have no idea.
Alfred: *humming while reading lab results on the Batcomputer*
Alfred: The good news, Master Jason, is that you are a perfectly healthy 50-year-old man.
Jason: Alf, I’m only 19!
Alfred: Tell that to your liver.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 