Robin: It’s not a spaceship.
Beast Boy: Well, if it smells like a duck, walks like a duck, quacks like a duck…
Robin: But then it would be a duck, not a spaceship, so your point escapes me.
Beast Boy: *rubs face in frustration* It’s just a metaphor!
Dick: *proudly showing off his perfectly fitted, new Nightwing suit from Wayne Tech* I even picked out a nice outfit –
Jason: Oh. Why didn’t you wear it?
Superman [to Batman]: *sighs* Is this one of those times you ask me a question when you already know the answer?
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
And Bruce is like, “When is it not?”.
Selina: I love Bruce, but I don’t know about him raising a child.
Dick: He raised me.
Selina: Well, now you’ve put me in an awkward position.
Nightwing: *tying up a criminal*
Nightwing: Sorry I aggravated you. But just so you know, a lot of people think I’m adorable.
Superman: You just can’t do it, can you?
Batman: Do what?
Superman: Just be a normal human being and say, “Hey, Clark, I wanted to help.”
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
It’s almost as difficult to him as asking for help.
Bruce trying his hand at fatherhood…
Bruce [to Damian]: Here’s some money. *hands over $100*
Bruce: Go see a “Star War”.
Teaching your little brother (who was raised by assassins in a mountain far away) about sports be like…
Dick: *setting up the rims and nets*
Jason: *dribbling the balls*
Tim: *configuring the shot clock*
Damian: *putting on his cleats* I’ve never played basketball. I’m certain I’ll pick it up. Who’s going to be goalie?
At the Annual Justice League Sports Meet…
Green Lantern: *reading the mechanics* Number one is being able to run two miles in under five minutes. That’s a typo, right? That’s not humanly possible.
The Flash: *looks at the camera like he’s on “The Office”*
~ • ~ • ~ • ~ • ~
Your best buddy’s right there, Hal.
Tim: *tightening his tie and straightening out his double-breasted suit in front of a mirror*
Tim: I’m going to the movies with Tam. I don’t want her to think I think it’s a date.
Jason: Do you think it’s a date?
Tim: *clipping his cuff links and shining his black Oxford shoes* No, but she might think I think it’s a date, even though I don’t.
Jason: Or you might think she thinks you think it’s a date, even though she doesn’t.
Tim: *grooming his hair* Are we overthinking this?
Jason: *handing him a bouquet of roses and a box of chocolates* Not at all.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 