After rescuing Red Robin from a solo mission gone awry…
Bruce: If I have to hear one more time that you did this for the family…
Tim: I did it for me. I liked it. I was good at it. And… I was really… I was alive.
Breaking into pairs for a Justice League mission be like…
Green Lantern [about Batman]: I’m very flattered. I was his second choice after “Pass”.
Mornings at the Manor…
Tim: I’m losing my mind, guys. I sometimes touch the frayed part of the power cord just to feel something.
Alfred: *swiftly takes a step to the side to hide a frayed wire jutting from the kitchen wall*
Jason: *carefully pries the mug of espresso off Tim’s pale, trembling fingers*
Damian: *stealthily moves the butter knife away from Tim’s grasp*
Dick: *grabs Tim’s face and buries it on his chest in a tight hug*
Bruce: *closes the Gotham Gazette, stands up, then fireman-carries his heavily sleep-deprived son up to his room*
Batman: *watching security footage of Green Lantern and Green Arrow making fun of him while he was giving a mission briefing earlier that day* Hn. Do they have any idea how much stalking experience I have?
Superman: If only they did, Bruce. You’re very prolific. You’re the Picasso of creepiness.
Sparring session at the Batcave…
Nightwing: *lights up escrima sticks*
Red Hood: *cocks guns*
Red Robin: *twirls Bo staff*
Robin: *pulls sword out of scabbard*
Robin: *pushes it back*
Red Robin: *smirks* What are you afraid of?
Robin: I’m afraid I’m gonna hit you all so hard that I’ll be an only child.
And he didn’t mean that to be cocky this time. It’s a legitimate concern.
When you’re secretly feeling insecure because your kids seem to prefer being with their Kryptonian uncle over you…
Batman: *all up in Superman’s space* Because I’m a cool dad, Clark.
Batman: That’s my thang. I’m hip, I surf the web, I text. LOL: laugh out loud. OMG: oh my Grodd. WTF: why the face.
Trying to figure out if Batman’s metahuman or not be like…
The Flash: What do you think he is?
Green Lantern: Not what I thought he’d be.
The Flash: What did you think he’d be?
Green Lantern: Fun.
You know that end scene in “Justice League” (2017)?
Bruce: Can I start buying you things now?
Clark: No, you can’t. But, hey, I’ll tell you what. You can buy Lois stuff.
Bruce: I know you’d like a new tractor.
Clark: Lois would love a new tractor.
Uh huh, Clark.
Also, Bruce buying him things? Canon. And by “things”, I mean real estate property and stuff. And by “canon”, I mean canon, folks.
Superman: Bruce, I’m not going to lie to your son.
Batman: Come on, Clark. I lie to my sons all the time.
Sometimes your best friend just needs to hear it from you…
Batman: *typing on the Batcomputer*
Superman: *whooshes into the Batcave* Oh, Bruce, I feel so foolish.
Batman: *reading casefiles* No.
Superman: Yes. I’m foolish and I’m funny and I’m needy. Am I needy?
Batman: *shuts down the Batcomputer* No.
Superman: Are you sure I’m not needy? ‘Cause I feel needy sometimes.
Batman: No. *walks out of the Batcave*
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