Nightwing: *admiring his own reflection on the window* An old lady in a limo once told me that I could be a model.
Red Robin: *hacking into the mainframe* I know, Dick. I stopped you from getting into that limo.
Author: chocoh0lic0201
When you’re not really fond of entertaining guests at your safe house (including brothers who come by unannounced after patrol)…
Nightwing: *climbs in through a window, stomach grumbling*
Nightwing *opens the refrigerator door*
Jason: *in his pajamas, turns on the kitchen light* This is a food-free household, and you need to lose a little weight, so this is really a win-win.
Damian: *walks away after insulting Jason*
Jason: He’s a mean kid.
Tim: So, what? You’re mean, too.
Jason: Yes, but not to you!
Tim: Yesterday you told me my head was too big for my neck.
Jason: That was… constructive criticism.
Tim: Well, what am I supposed to do about it, Jay?!
Jason: As a brother, my job is only to point things out.
Dick: *watching as Wally devours a five-course meal*
Dick: *ducking as scraps of food fly towards him* Breathe and eat –
Wally: *not letting up*
Dick: – separately!
when you tryna chill but your siblings love annoyin you
Imagine: Red Hood (taking advantage of downtime during patrol) and Nightwing.
Nerd v Nerd: Dawn of Dorkiness…
Superboy: *checking out gadgets* How much for your entire collection?
Toyman: Um, the Speed of Light expressed in dollars.
Red Robin [to Superboy]: Just give him Faraday’s Constant.
Red Hood: *struggling to disarm motion-triggered, exploding handcuffs with a lock-pick*
Red Robin: *swiftly removes his handcuffs once the henchman leaves the room and starts working on Jason’s*
Red Hood: What th-
Red Robin: Remember when you called me a “nerd” before? Get ready to apologize.
Why the Batman’s never flying commercial with any of his sons again…
Jason: *chucking the menu for first class at the seat behind him* How many beers can we order at once?
Flight attendant: I’m not sure… No one’s ever asked that.
Bruce: *at the seat behind Jason* Hrrrn.
Taking your crush on a tour of the Manor be like…
Tam: *walking slowly around Tim’s bedroom and checking out posters of obscure rock bands on the walls*
Tam: *smirking* You know, you’re weird.
Tim: *trying to sound chill while (almost) soundlessly dumping his disguises into his cabinet, kicking weapons under his bed, and taking down case photos linked with thread and pinned to his headboard, all while Tam’s back is still to him* You have no idea.
incorrect-batfamily-quotes 