Tim: *carefully running his hands over the dusty velvet Davenport in the Manor living room*

Bruce: …

Alfred: …

Dick: …

Damian: *smirks*

Jason: *shrugs* The Vicodin seems to be working. He claims that it makes the furniture feel friendly.

Jason, this is not what your adoptive father meant when he asked you to watch over your sleep-deprived, younger brother while they were gone.